Singapore is boring. What’s new?

From ‘Yeah, Singapore is boring: STB hits back at Timeout city ranking’, 2 Feb 2018, article in CNA

Is Singapore one of the least exciting cities in the world? The Singapore Tourism Board (STB) begs to differ – and released a tongue-in-cheek video on Thursday (Feb 1) to respond to the charge.

On Tuesday, Singapore came in 31st out of 32 cities in an anonymous survey by Time Out, which took into account criteria such as culture, food, drink, friendliness, liveability, affordability and happiness. About 15,000 people across the 32 cities took part in the survey.

Singapore was named “the worst rated city” for culture, and the worst for drinking apart from Dubai.

Saying Singapore, or any country, is boring is like saying watching MRT trains alighting and boarding passengers is boring. There will always be some people fascinated by it regardless of your useless opinion. No matter how much you want to add to the ‘vibrancy’ of our cosmopolitan state, the Casinos and the Jewels, we will always be viewed as unhip and sterile by marijuana junkies, Hare Krishnas and cowboys.

But what’s new? What would you expect for a small country? How much fun can you cram into this clusterfucked city?

We’ve been boring for 30 years. The Economist Intelligence Unit ranked us as one of the most boring countries in the world in 1987. More boring than IRAN and LIBYA. At least our stagnant night life today isn’t accompanied with bomb blasts or machine gun fire. At least if you’re not into watering holes or human company, you could hop on a train in the city and reach a mangrove swamp within an hour. Yes there’s not much that would excite you if you have a week to kill, but give her a day and there may be surprises in store. And if it still doesn’t thrill you, you could fuck off to somewhere ‘grittier’ where people spit on the pavements, piss on the walls or shit on the streets.

So really, there’s no need to be defensive about it. We cane criminals so instinctively we’ll be cast as party-poopers. Let Singapore be boring as a 50 year old marriage is boring, with the occasional orgasm to keep us going.

 

 

 

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One Response

  1. We need Disneyland, Legoland (instead of Malaysia), a theme town with European architecture (including English castles, English village, English town, Paris, Colmar, Venice, Oia all in one place), an American town with Victorian buildings, a garden of hedgehogs and European/American/Australian wildlife, Japan town, Korea town, western art museum, natural history museum in a classic building, cartoon museum, indeed everything that a Singaporean would like to see if he can’t travel by plane. These things, though not Singaporean, will appeal to both Singaporeans and foreigners and make this country less boring. Universal Studios, though beautiful, has a castle that cannot be climbed up and explored and the New York attraction has empty lifeless windows. The Gardens by the Bay doesn’t have many garden animals to make it lively either. Also hope that the Zoo has a real icy land for the polar bears. Or maybe HDB shophouses can have some Irish/French/Dutch/Meditteranean styles to their designs.
    Furthermore, so many Singaporeans are still single. We need more interactive clubs and places where strangers meet and talk. Often when I went to shopping malls, kopi-tiams and cinemas, people don’t talk to me nor keen to do so when I smile at them. This country needs to foster shy people for gatherings. People need to look at other people beside them, not their phones to make this nation more friendly. Social groups should bridge the generation gap, not separate them. I notice that the younger don’t mix with the older in group outings. Encourage more of 20s meet 40s meetings.

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