Lee Wei Ling and LKY are dyslexics

From ‘The long and short of rules’, 2 Sept 2012, article by Lee Wei Ling, Think, Sunday Times

…Ryan’s mother, however, reacted melodramatically. She went to the press with her son’s story and lodged a police report. She claimed that Ryan “could not leave home for two days because of the way he looked”. Then she arranged for him to have a $60 haircut.

She excused her son’s disobedience by saying he was dyslexic, and that dyslexics were forgetful. Both my father and I are dyslexic. We are no more forgetful than other normal people.

…Ryan’s mother’s reaction to the teacher cutting her son’s hair was, I am afraid, close to hysterical. How do we bring up our children with the right values when parents and schools send such conflicting messages?

I wouldn’t doubt a famous neurologist’s analysis on the symptoms of dyslexia, and I fully concur with her diagnosis of HYSTERIA in Ryan’s mother. But what’s interesting about this week’s Lee Wei Ling column is not so much her stand on hair rules or teachers playing barber (which is not surprising since she fancies a shorn crop, probably one that’s even shorter than Ryan’s), but her admission that both herself and LKY are dyslexics. Wei Ling herself once confessed that she didn’t really pay attention during GP lessons, which could be related to her undiagnosed dyslexia then. Despite that, she did well (an ‘A’ too) and look where she is now.

In a 2009 article ‘Morals and Morale’, Wei Ling was candidly honest about her problems with spelling in English, but did not shy away from boasting about how good she was at Chinese ‘mo-xie’, a test in which you had to regurgitate an entire essay or poem entirely by memory.

Those who know about moxie might be surprised to hear that I enjoyed memorising the classics, and I never got less than 90 marks for moxie. It was English spelling that I had problems with.

Since I had no difficulty with written Chinese, I blamed my problems with English spelling on the strange spelling rules of the language. It was only many years later that I discovered I was dyslexic in English. To this day, I sometimes cannot decide whether to use a ‘d’ or a ‘t’, a ‘v’ or a ‘z’. I have even more difficulty with vowels. Fortunately, my e-mail and word-processing programs have spell checkers.

In 1995, the good doctor was kind enough to sign up as Advisor to the DAS (Dyslexic Association of Singapore), an acronym which I’ve come to realise is a smart wordplay on how dyslexics tend to ‘mirror-write’ (DAS backwards is SAD). Wei Ling also spent some time in the 80′s as registrar at TTSH working with ‘under-achieving’ kids, a euphemism for ‘slow learners’ or ‘backward’ children. In the 60′s, experts were quick to discount myths that children who suffer from ‘word-blindness’, as it was formerly known, were ‘necessarily STUPID’. In the 70′s you would see headlines in the ST like ‘The bright kids who just cannot write; first in a two-part series on ABNORMAL children’. In the tradition of making disorders less dreadful than they sound by making them harder to read or spell, dyslexia has been rebranded recently as Developmental Reading Disorder (DRD).

Looking at the language standards of Facebook posts and Twitter feeds, you would think dyslexia, despite affecting up to 10% of Singaporeans, is still relatively under-diagnosed here. Perhaps the rate would have been higher if spellcheck and Autocorrect were never invented. There’s also a chance that with the stigma removed and dyslexia being erroneously tied to genius like how bipolar mania has become a ‘fashionable’ disease, normal people who write undecipherable emails may abuse the ‘dyslexia’ label by claiming they are ‘dyslexic’ when they’re just TERRIBLE, LAZY spellers. I hope DAS never has to change their name to DRDAS.

In a 2007 interview with the New York Times, LKY mentioned that an unnamed grandson was dyslexic as well (without saying that he had it himself), further supporting the observation that it runs in families and is more common in boys than girls. No signs of it in PM Lee so far, though he has the occasional lapse in mistaking one hawker food for another.

I’ve got one grandson gone to MIT. Another grandson had been in the American school here. Because he was dyslexic and we then didn’t have the teachers to teach him how to overcome or cope with his dyslexia, so he was given exemption to go to the American school. He speaks like an American. He’s going to Wharton.

It was Lee Wei Ling herself who revealed to the media that her daddy suffered from ‘mild dyslexia’ in 1996 (SM Lee has mild dyslexia, says daughter who’s dyslexic, 18 Jan 1996, ST), just like how she told the whole world last year he had peripheral neuropathy. Still, dyslexia didn’t seem to stop the elder statesman from publishing bestselling autobiographies showing a strong command of the written word, though I doubt he said anything about the disorder in ‘Hard Truths’. In the HongKong Journal of Paediatrics 2005, LKY was cited as a case study of highly successful dyslexics, where he submitted himself to testing only when he realised that ‘he couldn’t read fast without missing important items’. Proceeds from sales of a CD-ROM of his life were donated to the DAS (You can still buy it from e-bay but not sure where the money goes now). LKY’s affliction is proof that some dyslexic individuals not only function just as well as their ‘normal’ peers in society, but far exceed their abilities in all other aspects. The list include visionaries like Richard Branson and Albert Einstein, famed Scientologist actor Tom Cruise, Mickey Mouse creator Walt Disney, light bulb inventor Thomas Edison and internet sensation ‘Dog Bless You’ Dr Jia Jia.

And how could I forget Derek Zoolander and Homer Simpson.

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Teachers have no business cutting students’ hair

From ‘Teacher cuts pupil’s hair, mum files police report’, 23 Aug 2012, article by Lua Jia Min, ST

A MOTHER has lodged a police report after her 12-year-old son’s teacher cut his hair an hour before his PSLE oral exam last Thursday. The mother, Madam Serene Ong, is outraged that the teacher did this just before a crucial exam, that it was done without her knowledge – and that it ruined the boy’s $60 haircut.

She claimed the teacher – Ms Belinda Cheng of Unity Primary – also threatened to deduct marks from the boy’s exam if he refused to have his hair cut. Yesterday, the school’s principal, Mrs Jasmail Singh Gill, agreed with Madam Ong that the teacher had no business cutting the boy’s hair.

But, she said, Primary 6 pupils had been warned before about sporting long hair, and Ms Cheng had the right intentions. “The teacher cut the boys’ hair as she wanted them to look neat,” said Mrs Gill.

…Madam Ong, 39, a sales manager, said she received a call from her son Ryan Ang at about 10am on the day of the exam. His oral exam was at 11am. He was crying and told her that Ms Cheng, who is one of his form teachers, had cut his fringe and sideburns. He and the two other boys had been pulled up during a spot check for long hair.

“The teacher had no right to cut his hair,” said Madam Ong. “She showed me no respect by not telling me that she was going to cut his hair beforehand,” she said. “Worse, she threatened to deduct his oral marks if he didn’t agree to let her cut his hair. It was an hour before his PSLE oral exam. What if it had affected his performance?”

She said she was so upset she made a police report and complained to the Ministry of Education that night. She said Ryan did not dare to step out of the house for two days “because he thought he looked funny“.

Ms Cheng, she added, had also wasted the $60 she had spent on Ryan’s hair just five days before the incident. He has been going to a hairstylist at Reds Hairdressing for several years. Madam Ong spent another $60 getting his hair restyled on Saturday.

…”Doing this is like going back hundreds of years,” said Dr Foo Suan Fong, principal of Dunman High. His students are given a warning and a deadline to get their hair cut. If they do not do so, the school will contact their parents, whom it regards as “our education partners”.

Earlier this year, the police were hauled in to investigate a case of verbal abuse when a teacher told a student that he ‘didn’t want to see her face’. In the case of a vainpot Ryan who spent the equivalent of my entire year’s haircut budget ($120) at Red’s, my concern is not so much whether his teacher went overboard or if his mum overreacted (parents always do these days), but how his reaction to the ordeal of a teacher manhandling his funky mop speaks for kids of his generation, kids whose parents resist till this day from calling them ‘BABY’, though ‘babies’ are exactly what they behave like.

What bugs me is that he’s TWELVE, CRIED and LOCKED himself at home for DAYS as if it weren’t a few snips of a scissors but a crude lopping and scalping with pruning shears. Ever heard of a CAP, boy? God, it’s like the apocalypse just befell us all. I mean, just look at his pose. Look at it. I don’t blame the teacher for having the urge to run his head through with a motorised grass-cutter.

The police didn’t notice that in some countries this is an obscene gesture

And then take a look at this. Both images make you want to hurt someone real bad.

Cuteness in Spades

Having teachers multitasking as hairdressers is not a ‘hundred year old’ practice as one principal claimed. Hair-snipping as a last-resort punishment has been meted out as late as the early eighties, when long hair was a bane of society, associated with delinquency, truancy and Satanic rock music. Sometimes, even the vice-principals joined in the sadistic fun of seeing girls weep when their fringes are chopped off. In fact, it was only early this year that a similar case of police reporting occurred when a SEC TWO boy went home crying to mommy that the school’s stand-in hairdresser did a cut so patchy it looked like he singed his head over a BBQ fire. Hey, at least you didn’t get EXPELLED for unruly hair, eh? On the bright side, if you’re a kiasu parent volunteer balloting for Primary 1 next year and happen to be a PROFESSIONAL hairdresser, you have a high chance of landing your kid a spot, if only to prevent other kids from calling the police on teachers whose only crime is giving kids haircuts so awful they can’t face the world bearing them. How on earth are they going to post flirty pics of themselves on Facebook with such embarrassingly crappy hairdos?

Oh I know it’s blase to lament about how spoilt modern children have become, living a high-strung life of mollycoddling privilege with a sense of entitlement, cam-whoring narcissism and inflated self-esteem, brought up like little dainty princes and princesses with maids at their beck and call to carry schoolbags for them. Still, it’s totally unwise and unnecessary in my opinion that the police be involved in this matter even if the teacher got a touch too physical and intimidating at the worst possible time. Ryan wasn’t groped on the buttocks or hung upside down for days without food as punishment.  If the police call-operators had any sense of proportion, such petty calls should have been directed to the kind folks at IMH, who specialise in managing not only pediatric mental disorders like body (or hair) dysmorphic depressive disorder but anxiety management for the parents as well. Maybe they have special packages for such parent-son treatments, buy one sedative get 1 anti-depressant free.

Well all the best for your PSLE, Ryan. I’m sure you’ll do fine, this after all not being a test of your MANHOOD.

NUS Law professor’s $740 Mont Blanc pen

From ‘Law Prof charged with corruption’, 28 July 2012, article by Bryna Sim, ST

IT STARTED with a $740 Montblanc pen and ended with sex. Yesterday, National University of Singapore (NUS) law professor and former district judge Tey Tsun Hang was charged with six counts of corruptly obtaining gratification from a student in 2010. Two involved sexual gratification.

The gifts and sex were allegedly inducements for Tey to show favour in his assessment of the academic performance of then NUS law student Darinne Ko Wen Hui. Ms Ko, 23, graduated last month and is said to be holding a summer associate position in a law firm in New York. She has not been charged.

She said through her lawyers Subhas Anandan and Sunil Sudheesan yesterday that she ‘strenuously denies any corrupt wrongdoing’. Tey, 41, is accused of receiving the Montblanc pen from Ms Ko in May 2010. In the same month, he got an iPod worth $160 from her, and on June 22, he got two tailored shirts valued at $236.20. On July 1, she paid a bill of $1,278.60 for him.

Two prominent lawyers are hogging the headlines as we speak. One, an author of a book titled ‘TRUSTS, TRUSTEES and Equitable Remedies’ (worth $267.50. If you sell 3 of those you could get yourself luxury stationery), and a certain M Ravi with a personal mission to bring down the Law Society while dancing at Speaker’s Corner as a sideline. But I refrain from saying much about Ravi’s antics, since aside from the occasional derangement, he seems to know perfectly well what he’s doing especially when it comes to writing letters of complaint. Preferring to describe his mania as ‘eccentricity’ instead, he’s apparently a fan of evergreen Mandopop songs as well. I can’t think of a better actor to play him in a biopic than Kumar.

The ‘NUS Sex for Grades’ scandal is an extreme case of what we used to call ‘favouritism’, with Darrine Ko taking on the role of the ‘teacher’s pet’. Before such deeds were labelled as corruption, presenting gifts to teachers with the hope for ‘more lenient’ grading was something that even PARENTS would do. Back in 1989, the issue of ‘tokens of appreciation’ masked as ‘bribes’ was raised, when teachers were presented with CARTIER pens and expensive watches by wealthy parents via their kids. In Thailand, you can buy an ‘A’ grade with a bottle of whisky.

Bribery starts even before children pick up their first textbook. In 1971, for a measly $100, you could get a teacher to pull strings and get your kid in a branded school. Today’s parents may decide to go beyond ‘volunteering’ in schools to earn admission rights short of giving teachers red packets or ‘tea money’. In fact, if every subtle case of ‘you scratch my back and I scratch yours’ were classified as gratification in the legal sense, most of us who have ever volunteered to clean the classroom’s fish tank, carry our teachers’ books or treated our boss to lunch would risk getting embroiled in scandal though to us such acts are nothing more than ass-kissing, groveling, bootlicking, ball-cradling or in local parlance ‘sakar’.

To quote the writer of the above article, ‘Corruption may not be the oldest profession, it is certainly the oldest vice, for was not Eve tempted by an apple?’ In the seventies, students themselves had already learnt how to ‘score points’ with teacher, showing random acts of kindness such as buying food or being the first to clean the blackboard or replenish used chalk.  You didn’t need to pay their bills, buy them clothing or seduce them for a glowing testimonial. The problem with ‘acting on the ball’ for benefits, obviously, is that you will get noticed. Darrine Ko got noticed, and then some. This incident has brought new meaning to PET in ‘teacher’s pet’. If indeed Darrine had the motive and desired pay off but never got whistleblown, one can imagine how applying the same ‘soft skill’ in her current position would boost her career prospects. If another infamous RGS alumnus, retired pornstar Annabel Chong  had used her appetite for sex in a more discreet manner, she probably would have gotten more out of life than say, a reputation of  screwing 251 random men at one go.

Principal stalking students on Facebook

From ‘Parent claims principal stalks ex-students on Facebook’, 16 June 2012, article in asiaone.com Edvantage

…Another principal has made the news with his Facebook exploits – namely  for posting comments on pictures of his ex-students that a parent claimed to be “sexy and seductive”. The parent added the principal had made these comments when he was Physical Education teacher and is now a principal of a secondary school in the North.

A parent only known as Nel voiced his concerns on local citizen journalism site, Stomp. He said, “We (Nel and his wife) were prowling through our teenage daughter’s Facebook when we saw her ex-PE teacher making the comment ‘Nice!’ on one of her profile photos!

“Feeling uneasy about such a comment, we went into his Facebook account and discovered that he has been stalking his secondary students on Facebook, visiting their photo albums repeatedly and posting comments like ‘Nice!’, ‘Cute!’, ‘Sweet!’, ‘Pretty!’ on their sexy and seductive photos!” The parent added that the principal had crossed a line by commenting on these pictures. He also drew references to senior education officials Lee Lip Hong and Chua Ren Cheng who were charged for sleeping with the underage prostitute.

He concluded by saying, “What kind of message is this educator sending to his pupils when these postings can be openly viewed by all? “

No sane figure of authority will risk his reputation flirting stupidly with young girls on Facebook, and this overprotective, self-confessed ‘prowling’ parent should ask himself if these postings were in fact the work of an imposter latching onto the principal’s real account, or some prankster creating a fake account just to sabotage a man’s career, rather than jumping the gun and accuse the head of a school of preying on young girls. Flirting principals aside, what about the problem of his attention-seeking camwhore daughter posing ‘sexily and seductively’ and thriving on cheap flattery from random strangers? Or perhaps he’s using his daughter’s  narcissism as bait to lure curious boys and suitors for him to lash out at and revenge-stalk later, whether or not they’re pimply classmates or grown men with a weakness for underaged prostitutes.

Still, as a worried parent, such fears are not totally unfounded. In 2010, a relief teacher who added a student to his Facebook contacts ended up making indecent proposals once he got her mobile phone number. Anyone with filthy intentions would opt for the more personal mobile phone approach rather than soliciting through Facebook for all to see. So if ‘Nel’ needs to know if his sexy daughter is being stalked for real, I’d suggest he probe her phone’s message list first, instead of telling the whole world there’s another pervert principal on the loose and tarnishing the profession. Other parents would run a sneaky background check on teachers with Facebook accounts, and raise alarm bells if they discover he’s somewhat of a ladies’ man who poses with random women in clubs in his free time. Yet nobody rummages through parents’ Facebook accounts to expose what bad parenting skills, dress sense or taste in music they have. We have a Faces of Haters already, maybe it’s time for a ‘Faces of Kamchiong Parents’.

As if pupils and teachers haven’t had enough of each other’s faces during schooltime, social media has somehow morphed into a after-hours badmouthing battleground for students to rally against bad teachers, teachers to rally against nuisance or difficult students, or parents to shame overbearing teachers on their kids’ behalf. All this puts our educators at a sorry disadvantage. Some parents would forgo Stomp or Facebook altogether and make a police report directly for cases of ‘verbal abuse’.  A teacher with a Facebook account used to be ‘cool’ at some point. Today, he’s a potential pedophile who’ll tell you how ‘nice’ you look when he’s actually thinking, and maybe doing, something else while viewing your deliberately jaw-dropping photo which alone could pass off as a CV for a lucrative career in amateur porn.

Some teachers, assuming their FB identities are genuine, turn out to be pretty immature cyberbullies themselves.  In 2009, one mocked the atrocious standards of grammar in her students’ assignments.  Some of a more sadistic nature bragged about the number of lines their student were made to write out of punishment, or resorted to insults like ‘My stupid student is such a goner’. In a reversal of the above incident, another posted an exchange between herself and a student over a mysterious smell, hinting at sexual harassment by the student in 2011 (What’s that smell? Your pxxxy!).

Yet, just as there should be a penalty for teachers acting like angry teenagers, the ones who don’t bitch about their students online or even own a Facebook account should be protected against busybody parents or being maliciously framed by anyone with a grudge, even if these pranksters were students themselves. Facebook has no place in a teacher-student relationship, just as it has no place between a subordinate and a boss.  Anyone caught defaming an educator through FB should be dealt with as it were a ruthless slap across the face, just as any disgruntled teacher expressing their violent slapping fantasies online deserves to be disciplined. The cost of ‘losing touch’ with your FB-savvy students by not communicating online is nothing compared to the ordeal of just ONE parent reporting you for harassment if you so much as ‘act cute’ online or if your FB profile is not Virgin Mary enough. Even a smiley face may be misconstrued as a sly invitation to strip live on cam, not to mention a ‘Niiiicceeee!’

NUS Professor spurring creativity through LSD

From ‘NUS Prof removes blog posts on using psychedelic drugs’, 16 June 2012, article by Ng Jing Yng, Today.

The National University of Singapore (NUS) Chinese language and linguistics professor who suggested the use of psychedelic drugs to spur creativity among youths, has since removed his blog post. He also removed most of his blog entries related to the topic of psychedelic drug use.

Associate Professor Shi Yuzhi in a blog post on Thursday night explained that many people were still not ready to participate in the discussion. He wrote: “To prevent others from misreading or misconstruing (my intentions), I have decided to remove the posts temporarily”. In this same entry, he stressed that he was merely sharing late Apple founder Steve Job’s experiences with psychedelic drugs. “It does not represent my views, I was interested in this issue and wanted to spur public discourse on this,” he added.

Assoc Prof Shi’s actions came after the NUS on Wednesday said that it was investigating the matter. The university has also since publicly distanced itself from Assoc Prof Shi’s comments and was said to be in touch with him. In a blog post on Tuesday, the academic who hails from China made reference to Mr Jobs and his use of LSD, asking if such drugs could be helpful in creating creative thinkers in China. The post has attracted a slew of responses from netizens, some of whom criticised his suggestion while others agreed that his comments were valid.

Lecturer in the Sky with Diamonds indeed. Although Steve Jobs was cited as crediting LSD use during his hipster days for ‘thinking differently’, a more relevant anecdote on how major discoveries may have needed an LSD boost is that of Francis Crick, one of the discoverers of DNA, who envisioned the double helix during one of his acid trips. Other academic advocates of mind-altering substances include physicist Richard Feynman, Sigmund Freud and Mr Cosmos himself, Carl Sagan. The hazy hey-days also brought us a generation of creative individuals such as artists, philosophers, writers, poets and musicians, who, if not smoking pot or dropping acid, were on some sort of drug nonetheless, be it nicotine, alcohol or even caffeine (the proverbial philosophers’ coffeeshop). If we criminalised anything with a pharmacological action on the central nervous system, we’d probably hit a mass writer’s block and a nationwide dearth of imagination. In fact, we’re probably halfway there already. Except that we’re hooked on another sort of drug: Foreign talent.

With all these visionaries having dabbled in ‘turning on and tuning in’, I would think it’s perfectly fine, even logical,  to explore the relationship between bursts in scientific advancements and LSD as a tool for inspiration.  It is a valid question to ask even if it’s totally untestable, like whether people can turn into literal zombies, or if human beings were seeded from aliens in another galaxy. Prof Shi isn’t suggesting that there is a pot of gold at the end of the rainbow, though that’s what the NUS administrators seem to think of his question, fearing that endorsing drugs means more hostel orgies and students jumping nude off rooftops in their intoxication. This quasi-religious censuring is like punishing a priest for telling his flock that MAYBE God is just a figment of our imagination, a dangerous idea that no church is willing to entertain: A student’s ‘little helper’.

It’s also unlikely that ANYONE who takes controlled doses of LSD would get instant epiphanies; you’re not going to turn a wandering vagabond into a Nobel Prize winner overnight with psychedelic drugs. Some scientists get breakthroughs from other non-drug (or so it seems) means, such as Kekule’s account of a vision when he was half awake of a snake biting its own tail (the benzene ring). Other ideas that came out of dreams include complex number theories and even the melody of the Beatles’ classic ‘Yesterday’. The link between dreams and hallucinations is a blurry one, and you could say taking LSD is like having an accelerated ‘waking dream’. Every successful maverick has a favourite story to tell on how they stumbled upon their world-changing ideas, almost none involving pen and paper or through a textbook. You could be sleeping, sitting on the toilet, taking a stroll, idling on a couch, or in the case of Steve Jobs, getting high on LSD, before getting your ‘Eureka!’ moment. The inspiration for this blog came when I was eating with friends at Mushroom Pot in Stadium Walk in 2010, and no they weren’t Magic Mushrooms.

Then there’s the problem of establishing cause and effect. Were these scientists already creative to begin with, or did drugs boost their creativity? The fact that they ‘experimented’ with illegal substances does itself point to a certain devil-may-care, risk-taking attitude which is needed for any trailblazing work. Or perhaps the fact that they smoked this stuff at ‘parties’ with like-minded individuals in a relaxed (putting it mildly) environment led to a free-flowing ‘cross-fertilisation’ of ideas, which would have occurred anyway if they had been dining, drinking coffee, or playing squash. In the corporate world such get-togethers in order to ‘brainstorm’ ideas are called ‘retreats’, though in most cases they’re as productive as a damp drizzle.

Prof Shi’s suggestion of  ‘getting help’ from banned substances also undermines the ‘traditional’ process of innovation (i.e hard work and intelligent discourse), rocking the very foundation of the robust, scientific ‘method’ that NUS worships, not lying on the grass in a purple haze and having an image of a rainbow-coloured AppStore swirling around your head in a higher state of consciousness. If the prof had instead discovered a herb that ‘increases blood flow to the frontal lobe’ and suggests that consuming it could modify cognition, i.e a potential blockbuster drug in the making, NUS would have blasted the news with the enthusiasm of an Ecstasy user at a rave party.

Perhaps this uproar over LSD is because taking drugs to generate ideas or boost intelligence doesn’t just have implications on academia, but raises all kinds of moral and ethical ambiguities as well, a scenario captured nicely in the 2011 film Limitless, where Bradley Cooper stumbles upon a drug that turns him into a best-selling author, sexy beast and millionaire. It would have been more convincing if the guy was actually UGLY. It’s too easy and it’s unfair for anyone to be smart and successful without even trying. And that alone goes against everything a meritocracy stands for, though we have people who are effortlessly successful because their parents were. But that’s another story. NUS wouldn’t even allow the argument to go that far before forcing the prof to remove his post.

If you want to start your kids young with ‘creative thinking’ to get ahead of the curve, it’s unethical to dose them with LSD (though those with ADHD  are using ‘focussing’ drugs like Ritalin). You just need to fork out money to enroll them in GEP tuition classes, whereby they’d be too busy with homework to take mindbending drugs or even dream their little dreams, coming out into the real world where the only ‘retreats’ from reality to ‘think’ about problems are in the form of company chalets, powerpoint slides and torturous minutes taking.

Keyboard thug apologising to DPM Teo

From ‘JC student apologises to DPM for blog post’, 8 June 2012, article by Stacey Chia and Matthias Chew, ST

Junior college student Reuben Wang was so annoyed by what he heard from a VIP at a seminar that he blogged: ‘F*** you, sir.’ The VIP was Deputy Prime Minister Teo Chee Hean, the key speaker at this year’s annual Pre-U Seminar attended by more than 500 students last week.

Reuben’s blog post went viral and he blogged again, unrepentant about his use of the expletive. But on Thursday, the St Andrew’s Junior College (SAJC) student had a change of heart, met Mr Teo at the Ministry of Home Affairs and apologised to him.

The JC1 student told The Straits Times later that he realised his post was ‘rash’ after reading his friends’ comments. Mr Teo said: ‘I am glad he has taken the time to reflect, and recognises that what he said, as well as the way he said it, were wrong.

…He accused Mr Teo of dodging difficult questions during the question-and-answer portion of the seminar on May 29, by turning the questions on students instead of answering them himself. They included questions on press freedom and a sense of belonging in Singapore.

Reuben wrote the profanity three times in his 700-word public post. Three days later, he wrote again to say he stood by his remarks, even as he conceded that his use of the swear word was in ‘bad taste’.

‘I  see people asking you questions but you tossed them right back, so I’m like F*** you..ooo-hoo-hoo!’

Just before Reuben had a sudden change of heart and decided to man up and apologise to TCH, someone wrote an article bashing his behavior as the sign of a cowardly, impertinent youth gone wild with no ‘respect for an elder person’, referring to the generation of kids who’re more vocal online than face to face as ‘a generation of keyboard thugs’. Fact is  ‘keyboard thugs’ have always existed, before even blogs or Facebook, and it’s not just irresponsible brats with no experience in the ‘ways of the world’ (unlike ‘elder statesmen’) who’re ‘hiding behind screens’ dishing out the dirt. Reuben doesn’t deserve to be given a name associated with certain gangsta rappers, and anyone who’s an advocate for Internet ‘hygiene’ should himself refrain from calling 17 year olds names as well.

Bone Thugs and Disharmony

If critics are so appalled by the utter disrespect displayed by an otherwise passionate 17 year old like Reuben, they’ll be in for a nasty surprise when they trawl random forums, where one will see anonymous ‘fuck you’s aimed at politicians in general, including the ELDEST politician ever, without even bothering to end it with a ‘SIR’. ‘Lack of respect’ and ‘Asian values’ are also used on plucky journalists who dare to interrupt elder politicians as well, as ‘Why My Vote Matters’ Today reporter Lee Ching Wern would attest in 2006, after calling the PAP ‘arrogant’ before the likes of LKY. ‘Asian values’ which tell you the right way to bow before seniors has no place in healthy political discourse, and even a politician on a ventilator with peripheral neuropathy approaching his 90th birthday shouldn’t deter challengers, as long as you pose your argument like a gentleman.  Of course it’s one’s choice if you decide to use ‘F-U’ is a stat sweetener (hence more attention) for what you write.  It’s probably unfair to generalise our youth as a bunch of gutless, ungrateful, vulgar cyber-whingers. If you equip a kopitiam uncle with the necessary skills, he’d probably slap TCH about with a couple of Hokkien vulgarities as well. And he may even be OLDER than our DPM too.

Before the rather harsh ‘thug’ connotation, bloggers like Reuben were  ‘keyboard warriors’. A derogative term meant to describe anyone whose online bark is worse than their bite, instead of the usual classic virtues of sacrifice, strength and honour associated with the ancient word ‘warrior’. Celebrity model blogger Xuesha used it against people calling her a bimbo for mispronouncing ‘Forbes’. A YOG Cheer contest winner used it against critics of JJ Lin’s ridiculous Oh Yeah Oh Yeah cheer. Before you know it, anyone with an honest OPINION is dubbed a keyboard warrior (which makes me the Braveheart of all keyboard warriors…You can take away my blog, but you can’t take away..MY KEYBOARD!!). It’s only in 2011 when the GE took hold that ‘keyboard warrior’ applied to people expressing their political views online without following up with ‘action’. Yet we know of people who talk  in public all the time with the same end result (NATO:No action Talk Only). Do we call them ‘microphone’ warriors then?

Once were warriors

Last year, the Cyber Wellness Student Ambassadors created a role unfortunately titled ‘Cyber WARRIORS’, where instead of launching online attacks on incompetent teachers as the role suggests, these volunteers are in fact countering ‘cyber-bullies’, who are a vicious subset of ‘keyboard warriors’ more aligned to the ‘thug’ family. To add to the confusion, we also have ‘trolls’ too. Thugs, warriors, bullies, trolls. I think we should rename the Internet  community ‘Middle Earth’, more specifically MORDOR. I guess we know who’s Gandalf the WHITE then.

This tired tactic of ‘questioning the questioner’, despite its intention to ‘provoke thought’ instead of spoon-feeding kids with answers, should be used sparingly, lest it be seen as an unlimited ‘Get out of Jail card ‘when one DOESN’T have the answer himself. DPMs can’t afford to say ‘I don’t know’ in front of the bright-eyed future of Singapore, and we can’t expect them to have the answers ALL the time.  As a public figure, in fact for any public speaker with subject expertise in my opinion, you need to at least show some mettle and set an example through wisdom and confidence. You need to inspire instead of being seen as a ‘good listener’. You need to hold the handles on your child’s training bike and give direction before letting it go. You want your audience to occasionally nod in unison instead of sitting slack-jawed and dumbfounded feeling like this ‘dialogue’ was an utter waste of time.  You need to deliver a ‘take-home message’ not ‘homework’. Otherwise it’s not so much Q n A but rather Q n Q. Or you can totally dominate your quizzers like the consumate lawyer-politician that is LKY.

Perhaps our history of political stifling and fear indoctrination have rendered our youths mute in the face of politicians, which explains our pent-up hostility online. LKY once complained why no Singaporean spoke up at a NTU student forum. Vivian Balakrishnan had a tough time engaging youths in 2008, with one attendee saying that ‘you can’t anyhow say what you want to a minister…in case the minister shoots a question back at you’. Asking the questioner questions back isn’t the only thing deterring aspiring youths from confronting ministers. Some would even pry into your private life and ask you to to weigh your priorities between a pHD and having a boyfriend. It’s also not surprising that some conspiracy theorists would see this a calculated ploy to boost TCH’s ratings after his own WP bullying. A rascal says ‘fuck you’ to him and he not only tolerates it but entertains a face-to-face apology cum getting-to-know-you session, which gives the impression of a leader who not only encourages the youth to ‘think for themselves’ but is magnanimous and obliging as well. The government’s PR unit must be wetting their beds in ecstasy.

Parents sending kids for GEP tuition

From ‘My child is GIFTED’, 3 June 2012, article by Jane Ng, Sunday Times

Parents desperate to get their children into the Gifted Education Programme (GEP) are turning to tuition centres that claim they can help bright nine-year-olds ace the screening test. A growing number of enrichment centres are offering these classes at monthly fees of between $200 and $1,000.

…Mr Kelvin Ong, 36, went from being a GEP student to a GEP teacher before he quit to start his tuition agency, AristoCare. He decides whether to accept a pupil only after a month of lessons which cost $1,000.…He has even started GEP ‘foundation classes’ for kindergarten pupils priced at $600 a month.

At Doctor Peh Associates, a 10-year-old outfit started by Mr Allen Peh – who does not have a doctorate – children who want to sign up for the ‘GEP clinic’ must have English and mathematics scores above 90, while kindergarten pupils must have an IQ score of 130 and above.

‘If they don’t meet those criteria, the GEP is not suitable for them as their foundation is not there,’ said Mr Peh, 51, who has a science degree from the University of Toronto and an MBA from the University of Warwick….He charges $2,600 for 10 lessons.

Enrichment school Morris Allen offers an annual two-week GEP intensive preparation course in June, after selecting its pupils through an IQ test…. ‘With practice under pressure, and repeated exposure to the questions, they show significant improvement and become more confident in answering them,’ said Mr Scarrott (Principal). The fee for 10 days: $888.

Housewife Cindy Tan, 40, is among the hopeful parents whose children are attending GEP preparation classes ahead of the ministry’s screening test in August….’Every mother has hopes for her child. Since we can’t help him at home, we have to get some help for him,’ said Mrs Tan…Adrin, who scored above 95 in his English and mathematics mid-year exams, is getting help at AristoCare. He also has tuition. ‘He has the occasional tantrum but I’ll tell him to finish his homework and I’ll take him out for a McDonald’s treat,’ said Mrs Tan, who has O-level qualification.

What if Adrin does not make it to GEP in the end? ‘I’ll be very sad and disappointed – after all the money spent and we get nothing,’ she said.

I vaguely remember going through the GEP screening test myself and I had no idea what to expect, though I spent most of the time flipping my paper around to work on picture puzzles.  I might as well be deciphering hieroglyphics or Matrix alien squiggles. Not being naturally GIFTED, I flunked out of the first round. Now, if I had MONEY then, that could have been a different matter altogether. I would be out there, you know, making a DIFFERENCE, instead of writing a blog post complaining about GEP.

‘Gifted’ used to describe individuals ‘born’ with a special ‘talent’, and implies extraordinariness and exclusiveness, not something anyone can attain purely through ‘hard work’, or in this case, the help of an ex-GEP student turned tuition teacher with a ‘gift’ for business. One would expect an ex GEP student to do something more worthwhile with his intelligence, like solving the problems plaguing the world today (and getting a doctorate while at it), but that’s besides the point. It’s obvious that having a scorching IQ as determined by some screening test doesn’t guarantee that you’ll do anything particularly useful for humanity. There are so many exceptions to the rule, game-changers, high school dropouts turned self-made billionaires or Nobel-prize winning authors or scientists, people who excelled not just through IQ alone, but mostly through creative innovation, inspiration and sheer luck, things which all these tuition centres and GEP programmes can’t deliver in an entire lifetime no matter how many derivative puzzles they drill their gifted brethren with. Yet these ‘geniuses’ and ‘icons’, though having qualities of the ‘gifted’,  remain, in all appearances, perfectly NORMAL save a few eccentricities without anyone seeing the need to classify them as higher evolved beings in school.

Being a prodigy and working on your ‘gift’ go hand in hand, and one shouldn’t deny kids with a genuine obsession for complex maths puzzles from achieving one’s fullest potential in this scheme, at the risk of being oestracised from their ‘mainstream’ peers, which is an inevitable side effect of being cleverer than your age group. A screening test alone isn’t THE litmus test for genius, and selects for only a certain skill-set that may or may not qualify you as being ‘highly intelligent’.  If you can buy IQ scores through very specific practices like training an archer how to shoot arrows, one trivialises the GEP programme to that of a very expensive, elite mind-sports fraternity. You may well get a couple of sharpshooters in the end, though you’ll also have some singed by their own arrows, victims so worn out by the demands of the programme that their behaviour changes completely, some into angry little recluses who ignore their families. Moreover, the Ministry clearly feels that you’re wasting your time with ‘normal’ students, as what is stated in their GEP webpage.

The intellectually gifted need a high degree of mental stimulation. This need may not be met in the mainstream classroom and the gifted child may become mediocre, indifferent or disruptive in class.

Meaning, if you don’t put your above average kid in GEP, he’ll ROT in class among the minions! Such divisive , sweeping presumptions on what smart kids need for mental nourishment have led many to call the GEP programme ‘elitist’. In fact, the MOE’s statement is copied and pasted wholesale in Kelvin Ong’s Aristocare Gifted programme website. Hell, even the name of his agency has a kingly ring to it.  Here’s a chicken-and-egg argument in reference to those GEP kids who think high and mighty of themselves: Are these kids ‘gifted’ hence arrogant, or did they ‘become’ arrogant once they were labelled and exalted as ‘gifted’ 1%-ters? What have we produced in 30 years that justifies the relevance of a GEP breeding ground in creating mavericks, trailblazers and great thinkers? In an age where brains alone don’t cut it and ‘EQ’ matters more than ever, have we instead LOST ‘functional’ geniuses rather than spawned them through a scheme that cuts them off from the more socially fertile morass that is ‘the rest of us’?

The gifted have been stereotyped as being ‘socially inept’, stick to their own ‘kind’, and summon the image of an awkward, quantum physics textbook totting, bespectacled kid with imaginary friends because all his real ones have left him/her. Meaner ‘mainstream’ kids would refer to them as ‘freaks’.  ‘Gifted’ already has a euphemistic cousin known as ‘high-ability’, which attempts to tone down the lofty suggestions of innate genius but ironically emphasises the disturbing trend that one can be ‘trained’ to qualify for GEP, as long as you’re willing the spend the money and forget about June holidays altogether. One thing these tuition centres dare to boast about is a high success rate of passing tests, but as to what becomes of their students after that, nobody has the slightest clue. High-ability doesn’t equate to hire-ability. From the way they are being groomed and hothoused, they’ve either become stark raving mad scientists  or Phantoms of the Opera.

Adrin above is a high-scoring kid with the occasional lack of interest in homework (like everyone else) but yet nudged by parents to prepare for a programme which he may not be suited, using McDonalds as bait like a  Pavlov dog salivating to the sound of a bell. He may very well ace the screening thanks to some insanely methodical and ultimately meaningless grilling, but end up at the bottom of the GEP pack because his ‘giftedness’ is a product not of his genes or upbringing, but that of a tuition machine. Not to mention having his arteries clogged with all the fat from the ‘reward’ fries he’s been eating to finish his work. His mum may be utterly disappointed from all the wasted money and effort, but failure to get into GEP only means one thing for a face-saving kiasu parent: More enrichment classes.

‘Caring Teacher’ award winner abandoning dying wife

From ‘Baffled by award for teacher who went on trip while wife was dying’, 12 May 2012, ST Forum

(Mark Gregory Rozells): WEDNESDAY’S report (‘Caring teachers win awards’) about a teacher who received the Caring Teacher Award because he accompanied students to a competition abroad, even as his wife was dying of cancer, has left me baffled.

First, no school trip is planned and executed by one teacher alone. There is always a team of teachers for safety and contingency reasons. So how indispensable was that teacher to the trip?

Second, knowing his circumstances, shouldn’t the school’s principal have deployed another teacher to replace him?

Third, wasn’t the safety of the students on the trip a concern when the teacher rushed back to Singapore to see his wife before she died?

Lastly, what signal is the Ministry of Education sending to teachers and the public with this award? Abandon your families for your students?

The ‘caring teacher’ in question is Northland Secondary School’s Allan Yeong, whose wife insisted that he accompany the Boys Brigade Pipe Band because ‘he couldn’t let the children down’ (Caring teachers win awards, 9 May 2012). Whatever decision this teacher has made, he has lived with it for the last 5 years since her death. Without any knowledge of Mr Yeong’s personal affairs nor the exact circumstances leading to him leaving his dying wife, it probably isn’t fair to judge his actions based on what most of us would do, namely forget the pipe band and stay with the wife. The intention of the award is to recognise selfless passion, which Yeong has chosen to pursue in spite of what his wife’s family and friends may think of this untimely decision.

According to the nomination criteria for the ‘Caring teacher’ award,

A caring teacher is someone grounded in values; who cares, shares and shows concern for the academic, moral, social, emotional and mental welfare of his/her students

It doesn’t say anything about ‘sacrifice’, be it working overtime or forsaking your family to be a band chaperone. It also means you can be a total bastard and wife beater at home, but that doesn’t exclude you from becoming a ‘caring’ teacher. Or a cheat. In 2010, an ex ‘Caring teacher’ winner was sentenced to two weeks’ jail for tampering with his fuel gauge at Woodlands Checkpoint. In March this year, another award winner pleaded guilty to penetrating and molesting schoolboys, proof that being the perfect teacher doesn’t necessarily make one more humane than the rest of us. Of course, you can make a mockery of any award after winning one, but all the more scrutiny for a profession so extolled as exemplary citizens and role models as our teachers.

Going the ‘extra mile’ always comes at a cost, and it’s unfortunate that unlike past winners, the media has chosen to dig up the unsettling details of what Yeong’s ‘cost’ entails. God knows how many people have been neglected because their teacher mothers/fathers/sons/daughters have put their careers first. If we were to hear of a teacher working her butt off to the point of forgetting to feed her baby for just one night, we’d probably feel the same outrage. If every professional award were judged based on whether one’s moral conduct  at work applies to personal life, there would be no winners and there would be no point in dishing such things out at all.

Perhaps the writer has a point; that by rushing home to bid his wife farewell, the ‘welfare of his students’ was temporarily compromised. But then again, without knowing if Yeong did in fact take measures to ensure that the students were looked after in his absence, it’s rather premature to question on a technicality if he deserves this award or not, and argue based on the premise that a husband SHOULD look after his cancer-stricken wife instead of other people’s children. Maybe things just aren’t as straightforward as we think, it could have been a very painful but necessary decision for all we know. Furthermore, winners are chosen on the basis of nomination from members of the public including parents, maybe even from the parents of Yeong’s charges who voted out of gratitude/sympathy. So even if the guy lied and didn’t give two hoots about his wife, there’s nothing preventing him from winning Caring teacher of the year anyway, especially if even a sodomising pedophile can do it.

Teacher ‘don’t want to see your face’

From ‘Verbal abuse’ by teacher: Dad files police report’, 10 May 2012, article by Stacey Chia, ST

AN UPSET parent, learning that a teacher had used hurtful words on his daughter in class, has filed a police report for verbal abuse. Mr Mohamed Ariffin, 53, said that his seven-year-old daughter, who goes to New Town Primary School in Tanglin Halt Road, told him that her teacher said to her: ‘I don’t want to see your face.’

Mr Ariffin made the police report last week. The school and teacher have both apologised for the incident….Mr Ariffin, who is unemployed, said he learnt about the matter when his child was reluctant to go to school last week. His wife, Madam Norhayati Hashim, 43, a quality control surveyor, said: ‘She was always not very keen on going to school, and I used to wonder why she would ask me every morning if she had lessons with that teacher.’

Their daughter, who is in Primary 1, said: ‘The teacher banged my table and told me that she did not want to see my face after I told her that I did not know how to do a question.’ When told about what happened, Mr Ariffin first made a police report and then went to the school to speak with Madam Ng and the teacher involved.

I’ve written enough about teachers verbally ‘abusing’ pupils in a previous post (You’ve got the cheek to tell me this!) and how even ‘shut up’ has become as degrading as ‘son of a whore’. If you’ve ever experienced the police  delaying search for your missing pet goldfish, this is probably one of the reasons why. This sets a ridiculous precedent of teachers succumbing to emotional blackmail by their students, via overprotective parents who might as well march into the classroom with a chopper. Now you can come up with any woolly excuse in the world for not doing your homework as long as you know who to call when your teacher starts ‘verbally abusing’ you. Forget counsellors, fart cushions or car-scratching,  if you want to exact revenge on a cranky teacher, the neighbourhood police will be there to assist. The crooks, thieves, paedophiles, gangsters, kidnappers can all wait. Someone’s ego is at stake and the fate of one’s education as we know it depends on someone soothing it with a hapless apology.

Thanks to the likes of Ariffin here who’s taking up more of the police’s time than necessary and turning law enforcers into nannies from a child protection agency, you’d have to wait in line behind angry parents at the police post even if you need to report your neighbour’s crazy rotweiller for gnawing your bloody toes off. If some madman is out there spreading anthrax dust, too bad, there’s a foul-mouthed teacher on the loose! Oh think of the children! Yes,  Dad-who-called-police-for-no-damned-reason, no one from New Town Primary School wants to see your face either.

Toddlers in ‘preparatory’ classes

From ‘First to prep classes, then to Pri 1′, 29 April 2012, article by Jane Ng, Sunday Times

For some parents, kindergarten is not enough to get their children ready for primary school. They are enrolling their six-year-olds in special ‘preparatory classes’ that claim to give children a head start for going to Primary 1.

So on top of attending kindergarten classes five days a week, the six-year-olds attend English, mathematics and mother tongue classes once or twice a week. Parents are forking out $100 to $275 a month for these so-called enrichment classes provided by private centres.

Popular centres like Berries, Learning Lab and Learning Point have waiting lists of up to a year for these weekend classes. Given the growing demand, other schools, like Young Champs Eduland, have jumped on the bandwagon. Another, Enfant Educare, has nine of these programmes for everything from phonics to abacus and hanyu pinyin.

‘Enfants’, not infants

Prep class is basically TUITION for toddlers, and ‘giving a head start’ is being KIASU. It’s OK, we’re Singaporeans, no need to pussyfoot around terms like ‘enrichment’, when all this is really an arms race among parents pitting their kids against each other to the death, sometimes literally.  Tuition for pre-schoolers is almost a half-century old practice, or rather RITUAL. In other societies kids have to endure genital mutilation without anaesthetic or engage in bloody combat with the neighbours to earn their place. Here, parents chuck them into pre-school and pre-pre schools, supplementing with weekend/holiday tuition or cram school under the benevolent guise of ‘enrichment’. It also helps if you have a French name (Petite Papillon), sound like a fashion brand (Julia Gabriel) an Italian restaurant (Montesorri), or a haunted house (House on a Hill).    These are no longer ‘nurseries’; one centre even calls itself ‘Little Uni’ , making no pretense at all that they’re really gearing up children for the long and winding educational superhighway. The greatest trick these businesses have pulled  is convincing parents that children actually enjoy attending these things, rather than, you know, SLEEPING or playing with/eating sand at the beach.

Some centres, like Del Care Edu Centre, even provide lessons for 2 to 18 MONTH old BABIES. Which means we have children among us who recognise flashcards before their own uncles’ faces. Did I say ‘children’? I meant zombies brain-harvested to battle it out in primary school who can speak Japanese and French before crafting a proper Knock-Knock joke, or even walk. Before you know it, our kids would have evolved with brains bigger than their gastrointestinal systems and instead of ‘playing’ with them you are compelled to engage in a lively dialogue about phonics. No more trading goos and ga’s, funny faces or catching ball anymore. ‘Play’ has to be ‘purposeful’, ‘sensorial’ and ‘exploratory’ and they have to ‘self-discover’ or ‘self-actualise’ while at it. They no longer just read or write or doodle, but must nurture ‘creative thinking’. Nothing so useless as a tickle should deter a child from ‘achieving their fullest potential’. It’s politically incorrect to call your boy a ‘little monster’, he’s just ‘over-expressing his self-worth’. What these centres have successfully done is turn the wild manic beast that is childhood into a lab rat with electrodes and meters strapped to its brain. Which explains The Learning ‘Lab’, though another has the audacity to call itself the ‘Playground Preschool’, both an insult  to actual playgrounds and an oxymoron too. You probably have to do mental sums while going down the slide, or discuss Newton’s Law of Motion on the see-saws. In the Little Gym, parent-bonding physical activities are outsourced to the professionals, where you have pay a fee just to let your baby ‘tumble’.

Thank god we still have pets for what’s left of the fun things in life. With all the spatial skills and street smarts sapped in exchange for preparatory ‘knowledge’ and ‘grooming’, I’ll be amazed if our kids today can even pass a marble through a hoop, or even tell their parents apart from PRC kidnappers for that matter. I wonder just how ‘prepared’ these kids are for the REAL world, where you have this thing called PEOPLE to deal with; bullies, bosses, customers, friends, family, strangers etc, not just caged up kids grilled in the latest scientific educational methods. Just browsing through the various ‘philosophies’ of these centres reveals an unsettling trend, the premature quest to turn our kids into tiny, confident adults, all this in the constraints of a controlled facility which purveyors of patented techniques and ‘programs’ like to call a ‘creative environment’. Mandarin educators Berries refer to kids as ‘the most important people in the world’. Young Champs Eduland submits their clients to ‘leadership training, complete with character building skills to create individuals with a difference’. You see the same objectives for adult business courses. Why are these parents in such a hurry to see their babies turn into typical rat-racers, and why are these tuition centres inflating the child’s ego to the moon, fostering a sense of bloated entitlement that they are natural born champions, leaders or abacus wizards? Our kids want to be astronauts, pilots and ninjas, not business negotiators or politicians. Let them live already, just for once.

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