Locksmiths and real estate agents sticking ads all over the place

Posted on May 12, 2013 by gdy2shoez

From ‘ Illegal ads a sticking point for HDB residents’, 12 May 2013, article by Lim Yan Yang and Lim Yi Han, Sunday Times

Now that Singapore’s “Sticker Lady” has been sentenced in court for mischief, some Housing Board residents are wondering if they will see the end of a sticky problem they have been living with for years. They say locksmiths, real estate agents and providers of all sorts of services paste small advertisements and labels all over the place, and seem to get away with it.

Tampines resident Francis Cheng contacted The Sunday Times and said he has put up with ads and calling cards that have been stuck to his meter box, doorbell, gate and on the railings along the common corridor. “It’s a nuisance. I peel it off and a few days later they paste it back,” said the 40-year-old business manager. Competing businessmen sometimes leave layers of overlapping stickers that are just unsightly, he added.

…The police website refers the public with such “non-police matters” to relevant agencies such as town councils and the LTA….Technically, the law has penalties for unauthorised advertisements, under the Vandalism Act and the Miscellaneous Offences (Public Order and Nuisance) Act.

But lawyers said the courts are unlikely to act against businesses that do not adhere to the rules unless home owners pursue the matters themselves by lodging a magistrate’s complaint. “Some might argue that it’s a slippery slope: if you don’t arrest them, they will paste more stickers,” said criminal lawyer Amolat Singh. “But the courts operate under the de minimis principle, which means the law does not concern itself with trivialities.”

He said the law must strike a balance between the fact that advertisements promote a commercial service – unlike in the Sticker Lady case – and that most people do not view them as mischief or vandalism.

Most of the locksmiths, plumbers and air-conditioning repairmen The Sunday Times called declined to talk about their ads but one argued that his sticker has helped many people. The 40-year-old locksmith, who declined to be named, said: “Those who complain are those who haven’t had their door spoilt or forgotten their keys.”

Your grandfather meter box is it

I have to admit I once benefited from a vandal’s calling card stuck on a letter box. My door was jammed and I had no one to call. It was, for my intents and purposes, an emergency and I remain grateful enough to close one eye to rival locksmiths tearing each others’ stickers or sticking their ads on top of each other outside my house as long as it’s not on my gate. Property flyers on the other hand, are a downright nuisance, the only consolation being sometimes they come with eye candy amidst the eyesore, on which I’d waste a couple of seconds of my life ogling before tossing it away for recycling.

Need a house NOW

So we have one group of people running foul of Vandalism laws, another being annoying Litterbugs, with neither getting arrested for their deeds, while a graffiti artist with better aesthetic taste when it comes to stickers gets charged for mischief and has to serve 240 hours of community service. If Samantha Lo had inserted an additional line in her Press Until Shiok stickers advertising swimming lessons and a fake number, maybe the law would consider her actions ‘trivial’ as well.

I can’t say, however, that MOST people don’t mind such rampant defacement. Maybe some folks like myself do benefit from sticky ads, whether it’s breaking into their own house urgently or selling their homes at cushy prices. But I’m certain there are many who find it more disruptive and polluting than Sam Lo’s street work, so I question the lawyer’s assumption unless he had run a nationwide survey to ask Singaporeans what they think of sticker ads. There’s also a suggestion of exemption from penalty if your sticker is about a ‘commercial service’ rather than ‘art’. Which means there’s a chance you may be an illegal landlord, uncertified driving instructor or maybe even a prostitute sticking ads willy-nilly and not get caught. What if you’re spreading the gospel through stickers, like what happened in 1977 with a ‘I found it’ campaign? (‘It’ meaning ‘a life in Jesus Christ’). Would the authorities have hauled in a church leader for ‘mischief’ or use some fancy legal Latin term to convince us that he did no wrong?

It also begs the question of what exactly the law considers a ‘triviality’ which it doesn’t concern itself with. One man’s triviality is another’s outrage. If Sticker Lady had simply pasted ONE offending sticker in town, maybe less than 2 cm in radius, would it be ‘trivial’ enough to adhere to the ‘de minimis’ principle? One HDB owner’s complaint may be trivial, but if EVERY level on EVERY block of HDB flats reports a case of sticker vandalism, surely it becomes a PROBLEM, one that I forsee our authorities and courts will no doubt be STUCK on.

About these ads

Filed under: 1970s, 2013, Advertisements, Environment, HDB, Justice system/Lawsuits, Public works, Religion | Tagged: , , , , , , , | 1 Comment »

Lift Your Skirt, Save Your Life ad goes against Asian values

Posted on May 8, 2013 by gdy2shoez

From ‘Ad catches the eye and raises a few eyebrows’, 8 May 2013, article by Debbie Lee, Eugene Chua and Joanne Lee, ST and 10 May 2013, ‘Cancer ad goes against Asian values’, ST Forum

“LIFT your skirt, save your life,” urges a new advertisement by the Singapore Cancer Society to promote awareness of preventive measures for cervical cancer. But the campaign appears to have raised eyebrows instead.

Public reaction to its posters, depicting celebrities in white dresses catching a rush of air from the ground, have varied from “catchy” to “obscene”…It features celebrities MediaCorp Radio 987FM DJ Rosalyn Lee, model and TV host Linda Black and 93.3FM DJ Siau Jiahui.

The campaign aims to encourage women to go for Pap smear screenings being provided for free by 178 clinics this month. However, more than 60 per cent of the 80 people polled by The Straits Times said the advertisement was not effective in delivering its message.

Respondents commonly mistook it for fashion or slimming advertisements….A quarter of the respondents felt the advertisement was offensive. “Most people are saying, ‘Oh, it uses sexual undertones to get attention, it’s effective.’ But just because it gets people talking doesn’t mean it sends the right message,” said Miss Yvonne Jin, a 21-year-old student.

The Association of Women for Action and Research agreed. Its executive director, Ms Corinna Lim, said: “It is a sad reflection on society that good causes also have to resort to sex to promote their message.”

(Dr V Subramaniam):…We have long cherished and promoted the age-old values of decorum, decency, good morals, respect for tradition and other attributes that go with our rich Asian culture. These values provide us with the cultural ballast against the influx of unhealthy foreign cultural trends and behaviour.

The ad to promote awareness of preventive measures for cervical cancer, which comes with the tagline, “Lift your skirt. Save your life”, is not in keeping with our Asian morals and is degrading to women. Left to the imagination, the crude insinuations can easily corrupt the morals of our young.

Otherwise you’ll get more than just a 7 year itch

Cervical cancer is no joke of course, as ambassador DJ Ross Lee would attest, having had a near brush with the dreaded disease herself. But you don’t need a controversial headline to grab the attention of Singaporean women. One four letter word starting with the letter F would do the trick: FREE, and that magical word that possesses Singaporeans into queuing long hours for stuff they don’t need is restrained here by small caps and boring font. Hell, you may even get a MAN to queue for cervical screening if you market your freebie a little TOO well. Maybe SCC should try the same tactic for prostate screening. I doubt anyone would complain of such an ad as obscene, sexist or defiling ‘Asian values‘, though some may accuse it of causing nightmares, loss of appetite and general distress.

manpants

It’s always tempting to employ ‘sexual undertones’ when you’re talking about cancers of intimate body parts. In 2010, another local cancer foundation used nude models to encourage women to, well, keep ABREAST of cancer prevention, painted NIPPLES and all. Just like those crying foul about this PAP smear campaign giving upskirt perverts ideas on the escalator, some dismissed body painting as crass objectification of women everywhere.

A very cheeky ad

Take away the provocative images though, and what you’re left with are awful puns like ‘Treasure the BREAST things in life’ in 2011, the kind of tagline that would only draw the attention and non-stop giggles of females with their breasts still under development. Unlike boobs, there’s very limited wordplay when it comes to organs around the pelvis without offending someone, especially when words like ‘penis’ and ‘vagina’ are still avoided by the media till this day. Even saying things like ‘Hey ladies, come spread your legs!’ can be as insulting as an orgy invitation.

You can’t make visual puns of erogenous zones without coming across as downright vulgar, like the ‘Unfurgivable‘ ad by the Ministry of Wax, which got some all fired up over a purse resembling female genitalia. Still, cervical cancer is the ONLY preventable cancer in women to date, which means delivering a necessary message and making it stick may be more important than what the good folks at AWARE think. All it takes is one person to notice the ad, ‘lift her skirt’ and get saved from disaster for the campaign to work. I don’t see how ‘skirt-lifting’ is a problem for AWARE considering they endorse anti-rape campaigns called SlutWalks. It’s also better to benefit from a lewd ad that is a ‘sad reflection of society’ and be ALIVE, than get your knickers in a twist and dead.

Filed under: 2000s, 2012, 2013, Advertisements, Campaigns/Elections, Nudity, Sex, Singaporean women | Tagged: , , , , , , | 2 Comments »

Singapore as a location for blockbuster movies

Posted on May 1, 2013 by gdy2shoez

From ‘Lights, camera, action – in S’pore’, 25 April 2013, ST Forum

(Matthew Varughese): THE Singapore Tourism Board (STB) is constantly striving to come up with creative ways to promote Singapore as a tourist destination…A lot of resources have been spent on advertising and organising events such as the Formula One Singapore Grand Prix. Perhaps it is time for the STB to consider another form of marketing that targets an international audience and creates a lasting legacy – that is, entice big-name international film studios to use Singapore as a location for blockbuster movies.

In this way, the STB can achieve its target of showcasing Singapore to the world and marketing it as a vibrant place to visit. Already, Indian film studios have shot movies in Singapore, and some Korean and Japanese bands have used our landmarks for location shoots in their music videos.

The next step would be to get leading Hollywood studios to shoot on location in Singapore. Our country has already been referenced in a number of films and, as a global city with multiple attractions and an iconic skyline, there should be little difficulty in incorporating a Singapore sequence into a modern blockbuster.

Regional cities such as Bangkok, Manila, Kuala Lumpur and Hong Kong have already made their mark in Hollywood, and it could be time for Singapore to take to the silver screen. Movies in the James Bond and Godfather series have become staples that will be watched and re-watched for generations to come. Should Singapore be featured in such a film in future, the effects of marketing and publicity would endure for far longer than any print, radio or television advertising campaign.

Singapore’s skyline will never match the scale and pomp of China or Dubai, where you have impressive monoliths like the Burj Khalifa as a phallic set-piece for Tom Cruise in Mission Impossible:Ghost Protocol. Hong Kong gets to be featured in Batman and was among the first Asian countries to headline the globetrotting James Bond franchise (You Only Live Twice, 1967). Even Petronas Towers in KL has been immortalised in the spy-caper Entrapment starring ex-James Bond himself Sean Connery. The last time someone attempted to pull off an action flick in our high-rise metropolitian setting was in the Hong Kong film 2000AD, which starred heartthrob Aaron Kwok and local actors like the now obscure James Lye and Phyllis Quek, though the HK superstar served more as product placement for RSAF in the trailer than a skyscraper-crawling daredevil.

Meanwhile, we await Hollywood magnates to take notice of the only candidate to star a blockbuster so far, the Marina Bay Sands. Fast and Furious star and rapper Ludacris gave us a boost by soaking in the Infinity Pool during the F1 season and tweeting about it in 2011, though since then we haven’t heard from Tom Cruise, James Bond or even the guys from the Hangover (with its sequel shot in hot and sultry Bangkok). We have, however, been featured in a Japanese porn film. MBS, chicken rice and all.

Even Julia Roberts’ character in Eat Pray Love would rather head to Bali for some spiritual me-time. So, if our buildings aren’t glitzy or gigantic enough and we’ve lost out on that Oriental lustre and LUST to fellow ASEAN nations, where does that leave us? Bollywood and its song-and-dance with national icon backdrops I suppose. Interestingly, the first ever Indian move to be shot here was titled ‘Singapore’ (1960), and featured Haw Par Villa in its prime. The ‘strange garden’ exists till this day, though more of a curiosity than a tourist attraction that it once was.

Screen Shot 2013-05-01 at 10.07.39 AM

There was hope in the late 60s/early 70′s. Homegrown action starlet Marrie Lee (real name Doris Young) was featured in several foreign films including the iconic, Quentin Tarantino-endorsed, CLEOPATRA WONG, which had our campy heroine kicking butt in Chinese Garden (Trivia: Cleopatra also starred a dashing BRIAN RICHMOND, now veteran DJ with Gold 90 FM). Then America took notice with the softcore thriller Wit’s End, aka The GI EXECUTIONER (1971), which featured ‘sultry Singapore’ and sleazy sex in the Raffles Hotel. One version of the trailer started with an old local smoking an OPIUM PIPE. Singapore would have been perfect for the Hangover movies then. I’m surprised even master of the C-grade action movie Steven Seagal gave us a miss.

Screen Shot 2013-05-01 at 10.18.10 AM

Then the Government happened. Local martial arts film The Ring of Fury(1973), featuring real-life kungfu master Peter Chong, was BANNED for its ‘portrayal of crime’ and depictions of gangsterism. Still, that didn’t stop Saint Jack (1978) from being filmed here, another American flick banking on what was left of our sleazy exoticism in Bugis Street. That means two American films in a decade, both with one thing in common. Barenaked BOOBIES. And nothing from Hollywood thereafter except for totally misleading references like the Singapore of Pirates of the Caribbean, a low-life haven that crosses evil Chinese temple with Old World kampong chic. Even our attempts to market the country through local film without foreign money have been stifled for being too seditious or racist for our own good. Jet Li, martial arts superstar and erstwhile Singaporean, has done absolutely NOTHING for our flagging entertainment industry. US chart-topping Singaporean diva-pastor Sun Ho would also rather sing about China than Singapore Wine.

‘Singapore’ has since been featured a 80′s MASK cartoon episode, the occasional foodie documentary with Anthony Bourdian and an Australian mini-series about the Japanese Occupation called Tanamera: The Lion of Singapore. Which ALSO FEATURES BOOBIES. Need I mention Sex: The Annabel Chong Story? Forget Batman, James Bond or Amitabh Bachchan. STB, you should know what to do to make Singapore more ‘Shiok’ now. How about an erotic courtroom drama about an underage prostitute and a high-flying politician, eh?

Filed under: 2013, Advertisements, Casino/gambling, Film, Local actors, Sex, Tourists | Tagged: , , , , , , , | Leave a Comment »

Singapore Shiok ad makes Caucasian look like a schmuck

Posted on April 28, 2013 by gdy2shoez

From ‘Singapore Shiok, or just silly?’, 28 April 2013, article by Nicholas Yong, Sunday Times

First, Singapore was marketed as uniquely itself as a tourist destination. Then, it became yours. Now, it is “shiok” too. The Singapore Tourism Board’s (STB) latest marketing video on YouTube revolves around the Singlish expression – derived from the Malay word “syok”, which means nice – for extreme pleasure. Cold ice kacang on a hot day? Shiok. The adrenaline rush of sky-diving? Shiok! Being massaged at a posh spa? Shhh…iok.

…In the Singapore video, a Caucasian man struggling to pronounce “shiok” – defined helpfully on screen as “a Singaporean expression denoting extreme pleasure or the highest quality” – opens the clip. When he finally succeeds, his Singaporean friends applaud him…Branding expert Tim Clark, a Briton in his 60s, thinks “using the local language to help visitors to connect with a country is a good thing”.

…Professor Gemma Calvert, a British professor at NTU’s Institute for Asian Consumer Studies, agrees with Mr Clark that the video makes the featured foreigner struggling to pronounce “shiok” look “a bit of a shmuck“. She says: “The phrase isn’t particularly difficult to pronounce and therefore may come across as slightly patronising to outsiders. As a Caucasian myself, I admit I cringed to some extent at the representation portrayed by this particular individual.”

…Creative director Hanson Ho, in his 30s, of H55 studio also notes: “‘Shiok’ is sometimes expressed somewhat artificially in certain scenes, making it seem quite unnatural.” For instance, having a little boy whisper “shiok” at the sight of zoo animals at the Night Safari seemed to be stretching it a little.

…Lawyer Samantha Ong, 31, wonders if the video could have varied its local vocabulary a little. “There’s a serious overuse of the word ‘shiok’ that’s kind of cheesy and annoying,” she says of the yelled, purred and breathed incarnations in the video.

“Aren’t there other ‘uniquely Singapore’ words or ways to express pleasure, such as ‘sedap’ or ‘ho chiak’ (delicious in Malay and Hokkien)?”

Shiok

By attempting to globalise the word and sell it to visitors, ‘Shiok’ has become as problematic as ‘Lah’: Both also ‘ANYHOW use one’. If a kid exclaimed to me that watching animals in a zoo is ‘shiok!’ I would instantly correct him that he should have used the more generic ‘Wahh’ instead. I may even tolerate the Americanised ‘Awesome’ or ‘Whoa!’. Other scenes where the use of shiok is exaggerated and unnatural include Singaporeans showing off their shopping haul, ‘shioking’ at a club, or marvelling at the LV island in MBS. A simple ‘Wow’ or ‘Niiice’ wouldn’t stick as well, but these poor examples of shiok are as misplaced as getting locals to yell ‘Yahoo’ or ‘Yippee’ while exhibiting ‘extreme pleasure’, though ‘yahoo’ is something I often say in my head with an imaginary fist-pump whenever I manage to board an MRT train during peak hour.

Singaporeans also tend to be bad teachers of their own beloved lingo. When UK boyband The Wanted popped by to perform, fans cheered when they said ‘Singaporean girls are SHIOK’. Totally wrong and even demeaning in today’s context, but the fans don’t care, and this mistake will be perpetuated to every celebrity the world over, who’ll pepper their concerts with forced Singlish like ‘You’re such a SHIOK audience, LAH’. Ugh.

Screen Shot 2013-04-28 at 8.12.39 AM

When singer Demi Lovato was in town, DJ Divian Nair decided to teach her how to use shiok (like ‘awesome’) as a warm-up during an interview, with the superstar obliging with ‘I’m feeling shiok right now’. Lucky Divian. Maroon 5 frontman Adam Levine says Singapore is ‘like, TOTALLY SHIOK’. Neither of these Caucasians has difficulty pronouncing the word, which is like replacing the C in Coke with Sh- (unless you want to be picky and insist that there should be a ‘-yee-ok’ sound). We seem to have an obsession with trying to get foreigners to speak Singlish with the same sadistic enthusiasm as teasing a kitten with a laser pointer. It may well be pride on our part to promote Singlish, but it does make a sporting goon out of non-Singaporeans when they mutilate it, be it shiok, lah or ‘Ho-Say’.

The worst abuse of shiok, however, comes from our Board of Censors. In 1999, when they found the use of ‘Shagged’ in the movie title Austin Powers:The Spy who Shagged Me objectionable, they proposed to replace the offensive word to the verb-form ‘SHIOKED’, as in The Spy who SHIOKED me, which would suggest to those unfamiliar with Singlish that shiok is a euphemism for the F-word. Thanks to our authorities, IMDB now thinks that shioked means ‘to be treated nicely’. If they had really pulled the title edit off, this ad, with the zoo kid whispering a potentially foul word into Daddy’s ear, wouldn’t exist. Max George from the Wanted would have said: ‘I’m here to Shiok some Singapore Girls’. To some cheers still.

Screen Shot 2013-04-28 at 10.20.59 AM

Yet, it’s not so simple defining when exactly shiok should be used. It’s like trying to teach someone when to use ‘lah’, ‘leh’ and ‘lor’. We have been known to use it in various contexts outside of food from which I believe it originally evolved (Humorist Paik Choo described ‘shiok’ mee rebus in a 1979 ST article). Enjoying rainy weather, lying on a hard cold floor on a blistering hot day or even sprawling out on a king-size bed in a hotel room may qualify as ‘shiok’ activities today. It’s often an interjection ejaculated reflexively, like the opposite of ‘Ouch’, and preceded by a period of anticipation or suffering, specific to a relatively quick, pleasurable stimulus. Nobody goes to a club and yells ‘SHIOK’ while dancing, nor experiences shiok-ness after staring at a fancy floating building for minutes. A massage after a long day? Shiok. A hot bath after a marathon? Lagi shiok! But saying ‘Singapore is SHIOK’? GET LOST LAH.

Filed under: 1970s, 2013, Advertisements, Censors, Foul language, It Should Have Been.., Local food, Singlish/Broken english, Tourists | Tagged: , , , , , , , | Leave a Comment »

Singapore Girl’s blue eyeshadow is very 80s

Posted on April 3, 2013 by gdy2shoez

From ‘ Singapore Girl gets a makeover’, 3 April 2013, article by Karamjit Kaur, ST

THE Singapore Girl has junked her bright blue eyeshadow for a more subtle and modern look. She is still immaculate in her body-hugging signature kebaya with her hair nicely done, but the colours on her face are less striking.

In her first major makeover in more than a decade, the iconic Singapore Airlines (SIA) Girl is sticking to blue, green, plum and brown eye make-up, and red lipstick to complement the colours of her kebaya. But the tones and shades are more subtle than before and trendier, said the airline’s head of cabin crew, Mr Marvin Tan. “When we embarked on this project with our long-time grooming partner Lancome, we took into account feedback from some customers that the previous colours seemed to be on the strong side,” he told The Straits Times last week.

…Freelance make-up artist Dollei Seah believes that SIA is taking the right step. “Wearing a blue outfit with blue make-up is very 80s. You can keep the blue but it should not be too much and it should be blended with other shades to create a more natural look.”

…Businessman Alex Wong, 53, said: “I’m glad the SIA Girl is moving towards a softer look. I do think some of them are too heavily made up, especially when compared with girls from other carriers.”

SIA ‘blue’ it when it came to eyeshadow colour choice

In 2007, David Keith,  president of Asia Pacific, Garner International, urged SIA to ‘get rid of the blue eyeshadow from the days when the Beatles were stomping around’. Experts in the field call it ‘very 80s’, while others mock her ‘screaming red lipstick and over-the-top blue eyeshadow’.  Blogger ‘The Last Alpha Male’ says it ‘basically looks good only if you’re WHITE‘ and ‘not in uniform’. I’m no fashion guru, but it seems blue eyeshadow doesn’t appear to as out-of-date as it’s claimed to be. The ‘electric blue’ look has been pulled off by celebrities such as Katy Perry and Rihanna as recent as 2009. I don’t know how it works on the Asian face without turning out like the evil character in some Chinese opera, or a Japanese manga fairy.

Gyaru blue

With the body-hugging, impractical kebaya still remaining as the signature icon of our Singapore Girl, I’m not sure how this ‘toning down’ of makeup is in any way a ‘makeover’. It’s like trimming your eyebrows or piercing a new earhole and declaring that you’re a ‘new you’. Singapore Girls still bun up their hair, waddle around gingerly and are probably the only stewardesses in the world who wear slippers during work. Having creepy eyeshadow hasn’t stopped our SIA girls from being voted among the world’s  ‘hottest’ stewardesses either, at the risk of their brand being labelled as ‘sexist’ still.

In fact, bright blue eyeshadow is scarcely noticeable from SIA ads and promos in the past, and I suspect feedback of SIA girls looking like the they’re auditioning for a Chinese Ghost Story are purely anecdotal, or exaggerated.

An example of overzealous use of blue makeup however, comes off a Wikipedia page. Even then, I personally have never been shocked by one, or at least not to extent that I thought that I was on an interplanetary flight to Pandora, planet of Avatar, instead of onboard a SIA plane.

The 'new' look

The ‘new’ look

Maybe it’s a guy thing. I wish I could say this tiny change ‘blue’ me away, but it doesn’t. So what gives? Is this an ‘out-of-the-blue’ marketing stunt to get people interested in the Singapore Girl once more? It’s not as if more people will flock to book SIA tickets now because their stewardesses look less like Abba. I personally never had a problem with our SIA girls looking like Twiggy or a roller skating disco dolly (maybe because I can’t afford to fly with them so often) as long as their reputable service standards are up to par, but it’s not so much the putting on of heavy makeup that bothers me, but the putting on of fake accents. No amount of physical grace or ‘subtle, trendy’ shades of blue will compensate for pretentious English in my opinion.

Still a great way to fly, no doubt, but the feathers on this majestic bird haven’t changed one bit.

Filed under: 2000s, 2013, Advertisements, Singapore Airlines | Tagged: , , , | 1 Comment »

Changi Airport CNY discounts for PRCs only

Posted on February 16, 2013 by gdy2shoez

From ‘Airport’s insensitive sale promotion’, 16 Feb 2013, ST Forum

(Ben Ho): …I had checked in at Terminal 3 for a flight to Shanghai late last month. I stopped to buy some chocolates and was told by the cashier that travellers holding a Chinese passport would receive a 20 per cent discount. Being an ethnic Chinese but not from China, I was not entitled to the discount.

I thought that was the end of it, but when I was walking towards the boarding gate, I noticed large signs and brochures in front of the information counter that were only in Chinese. On them were Chinese New Year greetings as well as information on a variety of discounts and offers at all three terminals exclusively for Chinese passport holders. Many stores were participating in this promotion.

I am amazed at such an insensitive promotion, especially in a multicultural society. It is disrespectful to have all promotional materials in a language that is neither the national language nor the official first language. Having a promotion based solely on nationality is also an unacceptable snub to other tourists.

I lodged a complaint with Changi Airport’s public relations office and received a reply saying it “organises different promotions from time to time, targeting different customers”. The Christmas promotions were listed as an example. But those promotions were open to everyone, and all information on them was in English.

One can argue that it is only a marketing tactic. However, there are many ethnic Chinese who are not from China but also celebrate the Chinese New Year. It is unacceptable that one of the world’s top airports should give exclusive rights to people of a certain nationality.

A very Snaky deal

Changi Airport spokesperson Robin Goh explained in his apology that such promotions coincided with the peak travel period for Chinese nationals. Still, it’s like having a Christmas promotion only for people who believe in the Lord Jesus Christ, or a Valentine’s Day promotion targetting couples only. There’s a fine line between ‘targetted’ and ‘discriminatory’ selling. If I give free drinks to women based on the size of their boobs it is discrimination against the less endowed because D cup women are not necessarily bigger customers than A cup ones.  Here, it is the shameless, strategic targetting of rich PRC pockets first, though the use of the CNY festivities as an excuse for this entitlement does put the true meaning of the New Year in a god-awful light.

There were hints of this happening since last year. Knowing that PRCs made up a whopping 20% of sales at the airport, senior vice president of airside concession Ivy Wong acknowledged that Chinese nationals were a ‘very affluent group of people’, and revealed that the airport will be ‘rolling out programmes to tap on the spending behaviour‘ of Chinese nationals, shying away from details. So I looked up what ‘airside concession’ is all about. According to a recruitment website it is ‘supporting the implementation of policies and activities in retail planning and leasing, in order to continuously improve and enhance our Transit Malls’ retail mix’. The title suggests something more intimately linked with aircraft, like leasing hot dog stands on the runway. But no, you don’t even need to know how planes work to get the job. And ‘tapping on spending behaviour’ is simply getting people to part with their money i.e marketing, promotion, the works.

This isn’t the first preferential selling attempt by a prominent organisation. Last year, Starhub offered freebies worth $50 for ‘expats’ from select countries participating in the Euro cup finals. The company cleaned up their mess by extending the offer to all fans to make up for what they called ‘scoring an own goal’. Changi would do well to follow suit, given what little time we have left this festive season. How about giving everyone an Ang Pow when they shop at the airport? Hurry before offer ends on the last day of CNY!

Airports are no longer mere transport stations. Gone are the days of just sitting around reading the paper in the departure lounge with a cup of chalky coffee in your hand. Fashionista paradise aside, Changi has also become a hub for fancy lucky draws and jackpot games that entitle you to a shot at becoming an instant millionaire. In the 80′s, such gimmickry were questioned on their selection process and racial bias. Someone lamented that awards like the ’4th million visitor to Singapore’ tend to be given to Caucasians rather than Asians.With all its promotional fanfare and bounty of giveaway riches, one tends to forget that they’re in a departure terminal, but rather the shopper’s equivalent of Willie Wonka’s Chocolate Factory, where the boarding pass in your hand is your very own Golden Ticket.

In 2011, one Chinese businessman spent quarter of a million dollars on a botttle of whiskey at the airport, as part of a ‘Masters of Spirits’ promotion, an invitation-only showcase targetting true ‘connoisseurs’ and ‘collectors’ of the world’s most expensive booze. With such filthy-rich visitors walking around just waiting to snap on any bait you dangle before them, this CNY ‘targetted promotion’ was a simple matter of opportunistic greed. You only have so much time to snare a big customer before they catch a flight. I’m surprised Changi didn’t offer free tram rides for PRCs just to get them from one participating shop to another. It also doesn’t matter to the people at airside concessions if these same rich buggers start rioting and abusing your ground staff over flight delays. In fact, all the better so they have more time to, you know, buy whiskeys and stuff to drown their sorrows.

Cops vs Shoppers

Filed under: 1980s, 2013, Advertisements, Changi airport, Chinese New Year, Money, PRCs, Shopping malls, Tourists | Tagged: , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a Comment »

Police report filed against Diaoyu Dao cafe

Posted on December 25, 2012 by gdy2shoez

From ‘Agencies to probe cafe over name’, 25 Dec 2012, article by Melissa Lin, ST

BARELY two months after opening for business, a cafe at Peace Centre – called Diao Yu Dao – has come to the attention of at least three agencies for its name linked to islands whose ownership is disputed by Japan and China. The agencies are the Advertising Standards Authority of Singapore (Asas), the Accounting and Corporate Regulatory Authority (Acra) and the police.

…The Sophia Road cafe, with an adjoining bakery, opened in October and sells Hong Kong fare like bolo bun and roasted meat. On the shop’s signboard are the words Diao Yu Dao, accompanied by a picture of the islands…The eatery’s walls are adorned with over 30 framed graphics, maps and photographs related to the islands, as well as information about the islands’ history and the dispute over their ownership.

The cafe owners are believed to be a couple, both Chinese Singaporeans. They could not be reached for comment.

Dr Tan Sze Wee, chairman of Asas, which regulates signboards and advertisements, said it will be investigating the cafe for possible infringement of the Singapore Code of Advertising Practice.

A clause in the code states: “Advertisements should not adopt or encourage a confrontational approach to resolving societal conflicts or differences. Advertisements should not exploit or fuel conflicts relating to national problems and controversial policies or issues.”

…The police said a report had been lodged and they are “looking into the matter”. It is understood the issue is related to the cafe’s name. An Acra spokesman said the cafe was registered under the name Onion Restaurant and Bar Pte Ltd.

Fishing for trouble

In a Nov MyPaper article, Diaoyu Dao cafe reportedly displayed a signboard bearing the words ‘Protect Diaoyu Dao’ (see image above), which is the kind of protest publicity that would rile both the authorities and Senkaku sympathisers. You can also find such call to arms on banners adorning vessels sailing around the disputed islands.

Naturally, someone thought this matter was serious enough to have the police come check it out, in case the eatery is really a front for an island-defending ultranationalist rebel Resistance and that its PRC chefs would one day decide to hold demonstrations on top of Peace Centre like their fellow countrymen staging illegal ‘crane-ins’. You know, like in Allo Allo.

The brainchild and boss behind Diaoyu is supposedly a ‘Chinese Singaporean’ in his 60′s according to cafe manager Jeffrey Ng, someone who could either be a Chinese patriot turned Singaporean or a Singaporean-born Chinese chauvinist. Or he could be a Darwin-reading naturalist raising funds to protect the ecological and geological diversity of the islands. It certainly doesn’t seem like a shop that specialises in seafood contrary to what most Singaporeans who haven’t heard of the islands dispute would imagine. Instead, you have dishes like roast duck rice served with LETTUCE. If you’re being enticed by a wall display of ocean panoramas and desolate islands, you’d be expecting fresh oyster hors d’ouevres, not bolo baos.

Naming a diner after a ‘fishing island’ when it sells duck and char siew is like calling an all-you-can-eat carnivorous grilled meats spread ‘The Meadow’ – it’s just misleading advertising. Choosing a ‘theme’ that reeks of insensitive propaganda brings to mind another unfortunate bar named after a WWII holocaust camp. Public display of politically charged banners and other peoples’ national flags are a no-no of course, though that hasn’t stopped people from putting up China flags outside HDB flats.

Funny how a name like Diaoyu Dao would get us all worked up and the police involved, when no one is complaining about another pub that calls itself Coq and Balls. I bet it’s not a place to go if you’re craving for roast chicken. If you’re going there expecting Magic Mike or some hot gay action, prepare to be disappointed. You may still try your luck during their Xmas bash tonight, though. It’s called Ra-Pa-Bum-Bum.

The balls of this Gastropub!

Filed under: 2012, Advertisements, Local food, Names, Nightspots, Police officers, PRCs | Tagged: , , , , , , | Leave a Comment »

9 year old complaining to MP about scary trailer

Posted on November 17, 2012 by gdy2shoez

From ‘MDA to probe horror trailer during TV primetime’, 16 Nov 2012, article in Today online

The Media Development Authority (MDA) will investigate if MediaCorp had breached guidelines under the Television Advertising Code by showing a horror trailer during primetime. Senior Parliamentary Secretary for the Ministry of Communications and Information Sim Ann, said this in response to a question by Holland-Bukit Timah GRC MP Christopher De Souza.

Mr De Souza had related how a nine-year-old resident (Renee Guerville) had told him that she couldn’t sleep after she saw the horror trailer on TV at 8pm. Regulations stipulate that on free-to-air television, trailers for films featuring violence or horror elements, which are unsuitable for viewing by children cannot be aired between 6am and 10pm, as that time belt is meant for family audiences. Trailers with stronger content can only be shown after 10pm.

I don’t watch TV, but I’m guessing this movie was shown during the Halloween season last October, and only one horror anthology has a track record of sending little kids to emergency wards for tranquiliser shots. Even adults would be disturbed by creepy movies that feature nothing but prolonged videocam footage of things waiting to appear out of NOWHERE.

Instead of calling for the ambulance like Italian kids, some traumatised Singaporean children complain to their MP instead of dealing with fear the usual way, by bunking in with their parents, snuggling with teddy or leaving the light on, until they eventually forget about it altogether. After all, it’s not just untimely scary movie trailers that will haunt a kid to tears. Seeing a squashed bird on the road would give them nightmares as well. If irrational fear didn’t serve a purpose, we wouldn’t be wired with it, and coping with ghosts and eerie pale children sprawling all over ceilings is simply the artifact of an emotion that would come in handy when you’re stuck in a tent in the woods, where being ‘anxious’ about what’s out there would make the difference between survival or becoming breakfast platter for a family of bears.

Most adults harbour a niggling horror trope in their minds, whether it’s the climax of Blair Witch Project or images from other classic movies like the Exorcist or the Ring. I belong to the generation where clowns are considered more frightening than demented chainsaw-wielding maniacs wearing hockey masks.

Not funny

The Internet, of course, is full of shock pranks like people cutting a nasty video into otherwise harmless cartoons or Barney. There’s also G-rated horror especially catered for kids, like R.L Stine’s Goosebumps. Singapore-based writer James Lee has also made a name for himself with his Mr Midnight series, which includes hilarious titles like ‘REVENGE OF THE GOLDFISH’ and ‘WHAT’S THAT THING ON MY HAND?’. Obviously some kids love being spooked otherwise these wouldn’t sell. The book covers look pretty scary too and I wonder if any other 9 year old is going to start complaining about such material being openly displayed in bookstores.

That’s it. I’m not going to Pastamania anymore

The above cover bears an eerie resemblance to a scene from Insidious.

ARRGHH

You can’t protect our children from the occult forever, and some parents would agree that it’s better to numb children to violence and horror early on before they start preparing for PSLE, when instead of memorising formulas they turn around to check on the door every 2 seconds. I do that sometimes when I’m alone in a hotel room, but I don’t blame my parents, the MDA or the filmmakers for it. If kids don’t start embracing fear and dealing with it, they’re always going to find someone to blame for their emotions whenever something tragic, violent or shocking happens. On the flipside, having surprise Jack-in-the-Box trailers on TV may be a good thing; shouldn’t you kids be playing outside or doing your HOMEWORK instead of watching scary TV?

It also helps that the writer is a picture of innocent youth, and giving a sympathetic fatherly ear would make any MP look good, notwithstanding how many other letters written by grown-ups about more important matters get ignored or served on a template. One must wonder what’s happening to parenting these days when kids are made to run to the authorities directly instead of having ‘family discussions’. Thanks to the attention given to Renee, Chris De Souza should expect more letters from concerned kids from now on, whether it’s about teachers being too fierce or why Santa Claus never gave them any presents for Christmas. Hell, if I wanted my MP to do something for me all I need is a pseudonym, bad spelling, crayons and paper blotted with tears. Why bother with formal lengthy emails when juvenile pleas would do? A 9 year old complaining about a Malay wedding Amy Cheong style would go something like this:

Dear Mr MP Sir,

My PSLE is next week. Today there is a Malay wedding downstairs in the void deck and the noise is very loud. The singing is very awful and I can’t study. Please tell them to stop. My daddy will beat me if I don’t get 290 for PSLE. Your help is very much appesiated.

Yours fatefully,

Ah Boy

Gory trailers are unlikely to turn children into emo recluses, but something else more sinister may harm them in the long run, not so much dark spooky shadows but bright golden arches.

Filed under: 2012, Advertisements, Local TV shows, Politicians, Violence | Tagged: , , , , , , , | Leave a Comment »

Health ministry banning unhealthy food ads for kids

Posted on October 28, 2012 by gdy2shoez

From ‘Ban on ads that drive kids to unhealthy food’, 28 Oct 2012, article by Salma Khalik, Sunday Times

Advertisements that make unhealthy food and drinks appealing to children will be banned from early next year as part of Singapore’s battle against obesity. Topping the list of ads likely to be affected are those for sweet drinks and fast food high in oil and salt.

Announcing this yesterday, Health Minister Gan Kim Yong said the action is not targeted at specific brands, but at unhealthy food. The move is an important initiative, he added, because eating habits are formed at a relatively young age. Singapore is also seeing a steady rise in obesity rates.

…Mr Gan said the restrictions on ads targeting children will start with television programmes and children’s magazines. Asked if ads for unhealthy food at bus stops near schools would also be affected, he said the ban could be expanded to other forms of advertising later.

I think it’s pretty obvious who this ban is directed at, though the criteria of ‘unhealthy food’ here is rather vague. You hardly ever see ads for ‘healthy, fat-free organic’ food, only because it’s the foods that tempt and kill you slowly that companies can afford to advertise on TV. You don’t see Campbell’s selling Cream of Broccoli to children, though some would argue that canned vegetable soup with its high sodium isn’t exactly ‘healthy’ either.

Let’s start with the traditional culprits, and this global conglomerate needs no introduction. They are, after all, the ones who associate kids’ combi meals with ‘happiness’. Many parents would even use them as a ruse to motivate their kids into studying for exams. You don’t see Mummy telling her kid ‘If you finish your homework I’ll make you some delicious wholemeal pasta with peas and carrots!’. Come on, they want their Hot Cakes and they want it now.

The above ad casts fast food as a comforter for disappointment, an emotional crutch, and that alone is a powerful psychological tool. Ads, however, are just one brute way of getting kids to eat Macs. The company also has the power to fulfill our kids’ wildest dreams, like sending them to the Olympic games as ‘Champions of Play’. The Health Ministry has NO IDEA who they’re dealing with. The corporate geniuses at Macs saw ad bans coming miles away, and their quest for kid domination began with a clown with red hair and a purple lump called Grimace.

Like Macs, KFC also espouses ‘family values’ (see below). But maybe it’s not so much the KIDS that fast food giants are targetting. It’s their helpless PARENTS. And grandparents. By the way, KFC porridge has popcorn chicken inside. Old folks with heart problems better watch out.

Ads for soft drinks, however, have recently been focussing on older youth, especially those who skateboard or shuffle on the streets. Presumably this demographic isn’t as susceptible to tooth enamel loss as our soda guzzling toddlers. Sugary carbonated drinks have suffered a bad rep for its visible effect on teeth. Fats, salt and oils however, don’t manifest until years later and are effectively ‘invisible’ threats. Which is why you don’t see many kids in ads loading themselves with Coke and Pepsi, though that’s not stopping them from picking up Kinder Buenos from the supermarket aisles, you know, the ones that come with the FREE TOYS. Oreos, in particular, are notorious for promoting family togetherness, even making a trademark out of the way you lick and dip one, one that can be passed down from father to son like a heirloom.

Sometimes you don’t need specific brands to subliminally encourage kids to eat fatty food. You just need a cute duck and a ketchup dip (which may not be very healthy either). This ad is a personal favourite of mine; It makes me want to add ketchup to anything. Sliced bread, rice, even baked beans.

But as with all things, there are of course grey areas, foods which claim ‘nutritional value’ but never ever mention how much hidden sugar, salt and calories they contain. Whether fortified with Vitamin C, protein or calcium, it’s hard to crack down on foods ‘bursting with goodness’ even though they still make you fat in the long run: ‘You can’t ban my Minute Maid for Kids ad! How else will children get their Vitamin C!’

Let’s begin with stuff you glob over sliced bread.

The tactic here is to bank on the fact that breakfast is the MOST IMPORTANT meal of the day, and your kids HAVE to eat something no matter what. Skippy is also marketed as some sort of ADHD reliever, calming the hyperactive kid down while dosing him with chunky peanut butter. Our parents are too busy to prepare wholemeal bread with lettuce, tomatoes and boiled chicken mash or squeezing fresh orange juice, and companies selling processed spreads and beverages know that ALL ALONG.

Boy, that kinda rules out almost EVERYTHING, does it. There’s still hope for cereal or fruit juice you ask? Or is there? Cococrunch is not only a ‘nutritious breakfast cereal’, it keeps your kid ‘active in school’ (so that they can pass their PSLE). The ad doesn’t tell you what happens if you eat it EVERYDAY, with FULL CREAM milk. They’re Big Cereal, for goodness sake. Of course they want you to eat it everyday. Your kids’ performance in school depends on it. I doubt the Ministry is cruel enough to take Tony the Tiger off the air. Not a ‘Greeaaaat’ move. It’s like killing off Superman.

How about this Marigold ad promoting fruit juice INSTEAD of actual fruits? Someone actually wrote in the Today paper to complain about this too. When was the last time you saw a Sunkist orange ad? You know, that round thing that you need to peel? With your hands?

And who could bear censoring Ribenaberries? These lovable creatures only exist in the TV universe. Technically one could argue that they’re not aiming specifically at kids, but who else would appreciate Ribenaberries, or talking fruits, other than kids?

There’s only so much you can do to stop kids from getting fat. Companies will compensate for the revenue loss by making their packaging more attractive to children, or tying in with toys like Hello Kitty or movie superheroes. Cinemas will continue to sell popcorn and soft drinks without leaving movie-goers much of a choice when we bring the kids to watch Madagascar. The greatest sinner of all, in my opinion, even if they never directly targetted children, was the use of the Avengers to promote the Double Down burger. By Thor’s Hammer, this grisly abomination is bacon between two fillets of heart attacks! You’d become the permanent size of the Hulk in no time.

This is heartening baby-steps taken by our new Minister of Health, but I believe it’s encouraging an active lifestyle that matters more than controlling what and how people eat, and in order for kids to play in the sun more, you probably need them to do less homework (MOE, don’t you dare think this has NOTHING to do with you). Clamping down on direct to consumer ads is just severing the scalp of one hydra; the authorities need to reverse the emotional grapple-hold that fast food giants have on the dreams and fantasies of children and their parents. As long as there are fast food sponsored children’s charities, irresistibly cute mascots and kids being conferred with ambassadorial duties as a Macs spokesperson, our kids will remain slaves to a fast food nation, and continue to ‘upsize’ while at it.

Filed under: 2012, Advertisements, Kids, Local food, Politicians | Tagged: , , , | 3 Comments »

Singaporean kids not using condoms for first time sex

Posted on October 22, 2012 by gdy2shoez

From ‘Singapore youths 20 times less likely to use condoms: Report’, 22 Oct 2012, article in Today online

Singaporean youths who were still studying were 20 times less likely to use condoms during their first sexual experience as compared to those who have completed their education, according to the latest Face of Global Sex Report. On the contrary, as a global statistic, youths still studying were on average 1.5 times more likely to use a condom during their first sexual experience.

…The Face of Global Sex Report 2012 was developed with the aim of investigating the correlation between using a condom at first sex and its impact on future sexual behaviour. The survey, which reached out to over 25,000 respondents in 37 countries, found that those who used a condom at first sex enjoy better sexual health and well-being.

…Amongst 506 Singaporeans surveyed, it was found that one in two Singaporeans (50.1 per cent) used condoms at first sex, while 62.5 per cent of Singaporeans used condoms during the last occasion they had sex.

In a 2010 survey conducted in conjunction with World Aids Day, 3 out of 4 gay/bisexual men reported not using protection during sex. The one cited above being a Durex survey, you would expect the design to be skewed towards demonstrating a positive effect of first time condom use. The problem is it doesn’t report how many actually CONTINUE using condoms after first trying them on. If you’ve had a horrible experience with protected sex, you’re likely not to go back to using condoms anymore once you’ve done it ‘raw’. Even if you’re stuck on condoms all your sex life, the curiosity of doing without it WILL kill you. It’s like taking the Singapore Flyer after skydiving. It’s possible that those who report ‘better sexual health and well-being’ are those who have, on balance, more unprotected than protected sex, especially if they realise early on that putting the rubber on means turning the pleasure off.

No matter what condom manufacturers claim, it’s common knowledge that wearing a condom during sex is like ‘shaking hands with a glove’ or ‘taking a shower with a raincoat on’. Our youths already KNOW what condoms can protect them from. They just believe that the pleasure that unprotected sex might bring is worth risking gonorrhoea for. I doubt there is inadequate sex ed in schools, so does this make Singaporean youth greater risk-takers compared to the rest of the world? And if so, could there be an underlying reason WHY? Could it be that they’ve found a cheaper alternative, like flushing their genitals with Coke? Or do they confidently believe they’re very well versed in the art of coitus interruptus, having been exposed to many demonstrations of it over the internet? Do we actually think we’re smarter than our genitals, or that we can outwit a very troublesome virus? Is wearing condoms to the Singaporean male a really WIMPY thing to do?

There’s no easy way to explain teenage sexual behaviour, but I’m postulating that overestimation of our powers of self-control aside, the cultural stigma associated with condom use, more specifically condom promotion, has something to do with it. And it’s not just the parents or teachers who are at fault here, there’s enough reason to point our fingers at the Government and some important Church members for trying to repress or neuter sex by curtailing safe means of doing it. I’ll work on the assumption that people, not just our youth, single or married, will have sex, protected or unprotected, ANYWAY.  Teaching abstinence these days is like preaching vegetarianism to a lion. So here goes:

1. Going ‘EWWW’ at Condom ads

As recently as 2007, someone wrote to the Today paper expressing outrage at an Okamoto condom ad on the TRAIN. Condom advertising should also be STRICTLY functional, without suggesting that using it is in any way ‘fun’. It’s like trying to promote hand sanitiser and telling people not to do ‘high 5′s.

According to the Singapore Code of Advertising Practice (2008),

6.7.3  Condom advertisements should also adhere to the following:

  1. Should be in good taste
  2. Should not promote promiscuity
  3. May include pack shots provided they are not suggestive or offensive
  4. Should not have erotic settings
  5. Should not include superlative claims
  6. Should focus on the protective function rather than the pleasure- enhancing aspect of condoms

Having sexy condom ads is not going to make people want to have sex. You have internet PORN for that. If anything sex in condom ads captures one’s attention, serves as a gentle reminder and if pulled off well, makes safe sex kinda COOL and ACCEPTABLE. It says ‘condoms are not just for family planning. Anyone can use them too’, and not a visual wagging finger to tell you ‘If you don’t use this you’ll get AIDS and DIE’. Which leads me to my next point:

2. Using condoms is BAD, SHAMEFUL and UNCOOL

The first ad to appear after a long-time ban in the eighties was GOVERNMENT endorsed, and featured RABBITS and the tagline ‘Family planning. Don’t chance it’.  Even then, such ads could only appear in print and not on television, radio or cinema. And in BLACK AND WHITE. Of course the Archbishop had a hand in it, along with others who blamed condom ads on increased promiscuity among not just youths, but the UNMARRIED. Humour was a no-no, which made the ads at the time family-oriented, pedantic and BORING.

In the hugely popular House MD, Singapore got a brief cameo in one episode, except that the use of the phrase ‘credit card and a condom’ seemed to suggest that we’re a SEX paradise. Well, looking at the corruption scandals and underage sex crimes here, that’s not too far of the mark is it? Singaporean women are also reluctant to carry condoms about in their handbags, an attitude which is a result of years of ingrained prudishness and ministry bans making the condom as difficult a purchase and as awkward a handbag accessory as a pregnancy test kit or a dildo. If you’re ashamed to be even seen with one because you’re afraid people may think you’re a wayward hussy or a pervert, you’re less likely to USE or recommend one.

You also have to choose the right spokesperson if you want to promote condoms. Would you use condoms after watching Ris Low sheath BANANAS with them? Would you even EAT bananas after that?

Sometimes, all it takes is a couple of bored amateurs, a camera and a blog to be an overnight celebrity, which brings me to:

3. NOT using condoms is COOL

Look at Alvin Tan Jye Yee and girlfriend Vivian Lee. Do you see any condoms being used in their ‘artworks’? Should Durex strike a deal with them? How about romantic novels or movies? Do you see condoms making 1 second cameos in the heat of passionate lovemaking? Can Edward put one on for Bella’s sake without first ripping it too pieces?

Alas, the benefits of not using condoms, in the fictional, otherworldly celebrity sense will always outweigh the risks of going without. Which means you need the condom crusaders to up the ante. If one insists on censoring condom ads, you should also flash an advisory before every love scene in a movie that says ‘Hey kids!Don’t try this at home, at least not without a CONDOM’.

4. Our ADULTS are not setting an example

If the older generation shirk away from safe sex, you have to expect our kids to follow suit. A miserable ONE in FOUR men who visit prostitutes in Batam wear condoms. Hell, such reports may make kids more curious about Batam instead.

4. Choosing the wrong size

Men are almost certain to overestimate the size of their manhoods. And even if you train them to fit condoms properly they’d insist EXTRA LARGE fits snugly like a glove. And then they blame the manufacturers for poor quality if the damn thing falls off, which is really an excuse for not using any at all. Well of course you could teach them step by step how to put one on, but the reason why they still don’t get it is more likely their lack of INTEREST than lack of brains. Then again, we all lose function of our brains when it comes to sex. At least the one in our skulls.

So, I don’t have a solution to our horny kids’ problems, but I think we have nothing to lose by loosening our grip on condom promotion. Our kids are already having sex, and there’s no ad in the world that would make them hornier than they already are. Let the companies go nuts with their campaigns, and more importantly, leave the government out of it. If they could grant condom companies the creative licence to work their magic on our youth, whether through witty ads or inspiring spokespeople, it would be truly a feather in their CAP (hurr hurr).

Filed under: 1980s, 2012, Advertisements, Kids, Sex | Tagged: , , , , | Leave a Comment »

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