Locksmiths and real estate agents sticking ads all over the place

Posted on May 12, 2013 by gdy2shoez

From ‘ Illegal ads a sticking point for HDB residents’, 12 May 2013, article by Lim Yan Yang and Lim Yi Han, Sunday Times

Now that Singapore’s “Sticker Lady” has been sentenced in court for mischief, some Housing Board residents are wondering if they will see the end of a sticky problem they have been living with for years. They say locksmiths, real estate agents and providers of all sorts of services paste small advertisements and labels all over the place, and seem to get away with it.

Tampines resident Francis Cheng contacted The Sunday Times and said he has put up with ads and calling cards that have been stuck to his meter box, doorbell, gate and on the railings along the common corridor. “It’s a nuisance. I peel it off and a few days later they paste it back,” said the 40-year-old business manager. Competing businessmen sometimes leave layers of overlapping stickers that are just unsightly, he added.

…The police website refers the public with such “non-police matters” to relevant agencies such as town councils and the LTA….Technically, the law has penalties for unauthorised advertisements, under the Vandalism Act and the Miscellaneous Offences (Public Order and Nuisance) Act.

But lawyers said the courts are unlikely to act against businesses that do not adhere to the rules unless home owners pursue the matters themselves by lodging a magistrate’s complaint. “Some might argue that it’s a slippery slope: if you don’t arrest them, they will paste more stickers,” said criminal lawyer Amolat Singh. “But the courts operate under the de minimis principle, which means the law does not concern itself with trivialities.”

He said the law must strike a balance between the fact that advertisements promote a commercial service – unlike in the Sticker Lady case – and that most people do not view them as mischief or vandalism.

Most of the locksmiths, plumbers and air-conditioning repairmen The Sunday Times called declined to talk about their ads but one argued that his sticker has helped many people. The 40-year-old locksmith, who declined to be named, said: “Those who complain are those who haven’t had their door spoilt or forgotten their keys.”

Your grandfather meter box is it

I have to admit I once benefited from a vandal’s calling card stuck on a letter box. My door was jammed and I had no one to call. It was, for my intents and purposes, an emergency and I remain grateful enough to close one eye to rival locksmiths tearing each others’ stickers or sticking their ads on top of each other outside my house as long as it’s not on my gate. Property flyers on the other hand, are a downright nuisance, the only consolation being sometimes they come with eye candy amidst the eyesore, on which I’d waste a couple of seconds of my life ogling before tossing it away for recycling.

Need a house NOW

So we have one group of people running foul of Vandalism laws, another being annoying Litterbugs, with neither getting arrested for their deeds, while a graffiti artist with better aesthetic taste when it comes to stickers gets charged for mischief and has to serve 240 hours of community service. If Samantha Lo had inserted an additional line in her Press Until Shiok stickers advertising swimming lessons and a fake number, maybe the law would consider her actions ‘trivial’ as well.

I can’t say, however, that MOST people don’t mind such rampant defacement. Maybe some folks like myself do benefit from sticky ads, whether it’s breaking into their own house urgently or selling their homes at cushy prices. But I’m certain there are many who find it more disruptive and polluting than Sam Lo’s street work, so I question the lawyer’s assumption unless he had run a nationwide survey to ask Singaporeans what they think of sticker ads. There’s also a suggestion of exemption from penalty if your sticker is about a ‘commercial service’ rather than ‘art’. Which means there’s a chance you may be an illegal landlord, uncertified driving instructor or maybe even a prostitute sticking ads willy-nilly and not get caught. What if you’re spreading the gospel through stickers, like what happened in 1977 with a ‘I found it’ campaign? (‘It’ meaning ‘a life in Jesus Christ’). Would the authorities have hauled in a church leader for ‘mischief’ or use some fancy legal Latin term to convince us that he did no wrong?

It also begs the question of what exactly the law considers a ‘triviality’ which it doesn’t concern itself with. One man’s triviality is another’s outrage. If Sticker Lady had simply pasted ONE offending sticker in town, maybe less than 2 cm in radius, would it be ‘trivial’ enough to adhere to the ‘de minimis’ principle? One HDB owner’s complaint may be trivial, but if EVERY level on EVERY block of HDB flats reports a case of sticker vandalism, surely it becomes a PROBLEM, one that I forsee our authorities and courts will no doubt be STUCK on.

About these ads

Filed under: 1970s, 2013, Advertisements, Environment, HDB, Justice system/Lawsuits, Public works, Religion | Tagged: , , , , , , , | 1 Comment »

Something is wrong somewhere with EC scheme

Posted on April 27, 2013 by gdy2shoez

From ‘Khaw:Something not right with EC scheme’, 27 April 2013, article by Woo Sian Boon, Today

A few months after some super-sized Executive Condominium (EC) units were sold at eye-catching prices, sparking a public debate on whether the EC scheme was being abused, National Development Minister Khaw Boon Wan has signalled that the scheme will be tweaked.

Speaking on Thursday evening to participants at an Our Singapore Conversation (OSC) session focused on housing, he said that “something is wrong somewhere” with the scheme. “We cannot carry on the ECs with these current rules,” he said.

 …Referring to the qualifying income ceiling for ECs, Mr Khaw said: “Hence, there is a sense of inequity here. The lower-income groups are getting less subsidies than somebody who is earning S$12,000. So, something is wrong somewhere. Therefore, we cannot carry on the ECs with these current rules.”

khaw1713e

$2 million EC condos aside, Khaw Boon Wan remained a stout defender of the EC scheme up till now. During the Jan Parliament sessions this year, he called it a ‘wonderful’ scheme because it was like giving Singaporeans a ‘Lexus at a Corolla price’. He could have made the same analogy for Nparks purchase of a $2200 Brompton bicycle, except that something did in fact go terribly wrong with the Brompton deal. Chan Chun Sing would refer to buying an EC like eating XO sauce chai tow kuay in Peach Garden.

4 months since the EC grilling by fellow MPs and our MND Minister now realises that something is amiss, not sure WHAT that ‘something’ is and WHERE it is. Your guess is as good as mine, sir, but it’s not very reassuring to hear such U-turns from our leaders. It’s like undergoing emergency amputation surgery while still conscious and hearing your surgeon murmuring ‘ehhh, something’s not quite right’ when your bloody sawn leg is already dangling by its tendons.

Wavering confidence and uncertainty has inflicted many a politician, including LKY himself. At the launch of his book Hard Truths, he said:

The message I want to convey is a simple one: we are a nation in the making. Will we make it? Am I certain we’ll get there? No, we cannot say that. Something may go wrong somewhere and we’ll fall apart.

In response to a horrific rape of a 5 year old child, the Delhi high court said ‘something somewhere is wrong‘. If you hired a plumber to clear your shit-congested toilet bowl and he said ‘something is wrong somewhere’, you’d probably want to flush him down the loo too.

‘Something is wrong somewhere’ is the kind of doubt any lay Singaporean may express, and it’s a flaw we knew all along from the moment someone decides to build fountains and presidential suites for executive condos, or sells off a Queenstown 5-room for $1 million. We don’t need to hear this coming from an authority who’s supposed to be finding and fixing the problem. If they can’t, well, then there’s ‘something wrong somewhere’ with the kind of pay they’re getting to do the job.

Yet, there’s one thing that Khaw seems to be dead confident about: That the government loses ‘hundreds of millions’ of dollars just to build HDB flats.  It explains why you never hear reports of HDB making tidy profits these days, it’s like a monk announcing that he won first prize in the lottery. Not so in the past. In 1970, someone calculated that the HDB made an ‘enormous profit’ from rental of flats and shops. In 1982 it was reported that the board made a $7 million windfall off carparks. In 2002, they made reportedly $87 million from carpark operations, half of that from fines.

How HDB manages its finances today remains a mystery, though our ministers would love to brag about how the government is constantly in the red to justify its noble mission of ‘public housing’. I suppose with all this ‘deficit accounting’ to deal with, it’s only fair that HDB gives its staff the occasional treat, like a Dinner and Dance at MBS with Daniel Ong as MC, for example (more proof of that ever happening here). Did the government subsidise THAT as well?

Filed under: 2013, HDB, Money, Politicians | Tagged: , , , | 1 Comment »

$2 million for an EC Presidential Penthouse Suite

Posted on November 24, 2012 by gdy2shoez

From ‘Khaw to developers: Don’t forget intent of ECs’, 24 Nov 2012, article by Esther Teo, ST

DEVELOPERS have been warned not to forget the fundamental premise of an executive condominium (EC) even as they fall over themselves to offer luxurious finishings to attract buyers. National Development Minister Khaw Boon Wan said they should remember the policy intent of ECs: to help Singaporean families earning $12,000 or less a month buy a condo for a price under the market rate.

In a blog post yesterday, Mr Khaw reminded developers that land prices for ECs are lower than prices of private condo land. This is done through the zoning and tendering out of the land earmarked for EC projects. Mr Khaw’s post came on the back of reports about a string of ECs sold at sky-high prices. A 2,845 sq ft penthouse at Heron Bay in Upper Serangoon Road, for instance, was sold for $1.77 million last month. And the upcoming CityLife @ Tampines will offer a 4,349 sq ft “presidential penthouse suite” that is likely to cost more than $2 million.

“I expect the developer to have done his calculations, to ensure that the unit will be affordable for the targeted EC applicants,” Mr Khaw said. While EC developers have flexibility in designing and pricing their units, they “must be mindful that flexibility must be exercised in keeping with the intent and spirit of the EC policy”, he warned.

Introduced in 1995, the ‘fundamental premise’ of the EC scheme was to meet the aspirations of the ‘sandwiched class’ who cannot afford private condos but do not qualify for public housing due to income ceiling requirements or wish to upgrade to a semi-luxurious apartment. If you consider the ‘intent and spirit’ of public housing in general, according to the HDB vision statement, it is to ‘provide affordable homes of quality and value‘. Just recently a Queenstown flat was sold for almost the same price as a EC penthouse at slightly more than $1 million. Khaw Boon Wan not only didn’t wag his stern finger at such resale pricing then, but coolly told buyers not to be ‘traumatised’ by the million dollar price tag of a HDB flat.  In the early 2000s, ECs were considered good investments, and with the first-timer $30,000 grant you could snare pseudo-condo living for $390,000. Can the ‘sandwiched class’ even afford million dollar HDB flats these days, not to mention ECs?

According to an ST feature on CityLife@Tampines’ presidential suite, it could easily accommodate four 5-room HDB apartments, which is almost twice the size of the Heron Bay’s five-bedroom penthouse worth 1.5-1.6 million. The latter was touted as the ‘first’ for an EC development. But you could also live in the lap of luxury simply by sprucing up your HDB flat into a ‘penthouse maisonette’, sell it for more than a million and get a landed property bypassing the EC route altogether. The million dollar EC is nothing new. In fact, $1.1 million was paid for a Pinevale EC in 1997. That’s TWO years after ECs were launched.

So just how massive is 4349 square feet, or about 404 sq meters of ‘presidential’ penthouse living in City@Tampines? Here’s a comparison:

 With skyhigh pricing narrowing the gap between public and private housing, is the ‘spirit’ of ECs still relevant? In 2002, calls to scrap the scheme by the ERC were rejected by then MND Mah Bow Tan. 10 years later some Singaporeans remain unconvinced that the ECs were really being purchased by their intended targets, or that using taxpayers’ money to subsidise these buyers would be put to better use helping the disadvantaged or those just looking for a roof over their heads rather than a private jacuzzi or having an address with a fancy @ symbol or a description of a body of water in it (Bay-, Sea-, Water-). The Heron Bay penthouse was reportedly bought by a ‘young couple’ who are also first-time property buyers. Considering that the household income cap is $12,000, the only logical conclusion is that these people come from wealthy families, and having a $30,000 subsidy helps too.  Sandwiched class? The kind of sandwich with prime Wagyu beef and foie gras, perhaps. Maybe the Ministry should review the the ‘intent and spirit’ of basic HDB housing first, before turning their attention towards profiteering EC developers.

Why buy an expensive sandwich when you can have a proper burger

Postscript: ($2m Tampines EC penthouse sold in two hours, 30 Dec 2012, Sunday Times) Tampines’ Citylife penthouse eventually sold for 2.05 million to a certain Ms C.Koh, who together with massive chipping in from her businessman father, bought the suite for her brother and wife. The whole family of 7 intends to move in. When questioned about the debate on EC prices, she said: “Why is there controversy? We’re just a middle-class family.” I’m not sure if this equates to being ‘sandwich’ class, but anyone who is a beneficiary of family finances and already an owner of a ‘presidential penthouse’ before 30 belongs to a WEALTHY family in my opinion, ‘middle-class’ or not. Also, no one is going to say “We’re from a high-income family’ on the national paper. It’s either a case of overbearing modesty, or a different interpretation of the term ‘middle-class’.

In 2008, ex NMP Siew Kum Hong defined the middle class as the ‘middle 60% of the population by income’, which ranges from the ‘lower’ middle class earning $2590 monthly (in 2005) to the top one-third earning $6575. The father of the penthouse owner himself admitted that his ‘son can’t afford it, he’s only a salaried employee’. Therein lies the ‘controversy’; that you’re entitled to HDB grants as long as you fall within the income bracket, when you could jolly well own private property so long as your rich Daddy helps out. And where do grants come from? Taxpayers who can’t afford condo living, that’s where. Is the EC system targetting the right ‘class’, or just offering discount savings for people who can easily own bungalows instead?

Filed under: 2012, HDB, Money, Politicians | Tagged: , , , | 1 Comment »

Amy Cheong blaming divorce on cheap Malay weddings

Posted on October 8, 2012 by gdy2shoez

From ‘Police report filed against Amy Cheong over offensive Facebook post’, 8 Oct 2012, article in Sg yahoo news.

Singapore police are investigating the former NTUC staff who was fired on Monday morning for her profanity-laced post insulting traditional Malay void deck weddings. A police report was filed against Amy Cheong, assistant director, membership department at labour movement NTUC, by a member of the public, Lionel Jerome de Souza on Monday morning.

De Souza is the secretary of Hougang’s Inter-Racial and Confidence Circle (IRCC), which comes under the purview of the Ministry of Community Development Youth and Sports. In his report, he urged the police to take a serious view of Cheong’s comments which “inevitably hurt the feelings of the Malays”.

In her post on Sunday evening, Cheong had put up a public status on her personal Facebook timeline, complaining about a Malay wedding that was being held at a void deck near her home. Among other things, she related Malay weddings to high divorce rates, and asked how society could “allow people to get married for 50 bucks”, peppering her post with vulgarities.

In a separate post, she also allegedly wrote, “Void deck weddings should be banned. If you can’t afford a proper wedding then you shouldn’t be getting married. Full stop.”

Unless calling a Malay an ‘asshole’ is considered a racial slur, I think this is more a case of carelessness and faulty logic than racism. There are, of course, people who don’t spend a cent outside the registration fee for marriage, and still live happily ever after. If Amy Cheong had complained about the noise rather than associating divorce rates with ‘cheap weddings’, maybe she would have just been let off with a stern warning without getting the sack. For someone who already lost her job, a police report seems like overkill, but for someone in senior management, Cheong should have known better, especially after so many incidents of Facebookers getting in trouble posting ‘silly’ remarks about Muslims, not to mention a certain filmmaker being dealt with death warrants for making a shoddy Internet film where the Prophet was played by an actor looking like Jesus. In such a charged climate of ‘anti-Islamic’ sentiment and its subsequent retaliation, it wasn’t so much a malicious, hateful remark, as it was a really bad idea. Of course our Facebook-savvy PM was quick to dish out the damage control by urging everyone not to let this incident ‘undermine our racial and religious harmony’. But maybe this is more a case of custom intolerance than a hate crime that nearly everyone is making this out to be. If I post on Facebook about ‘damned ding-dong-chiang lion-dancing’ during Chinese New Year, I would get the same treatment from the Chinese community too. Or would I?

Just last year, people were flamed for racial abuse after complaining about McDonald’s playing religious prayers during the fasting month, putting links to images of pigs Photoshopped on the Kabba, or calling kids on kindergarten buses little ‘terrorists’. But let’s see if high ‘divorce rates’ among the Malays is indeed a factual statement, and whether it’s in any way related to ‘$50 weddings’. According to a 2006 commentary by a Malay man, there are 3 typical reasons to explain the high divorce rates among Malays. One, the tendency of women to ‘fall in love’ too easily. Two, the cultural expectations of ‘short courting periods’ and thirdly, general ‘money problems’. In the same year statistics showed that divorcing Muslims stayed in a marriage shorter than non-Muslims (an average of 7.8 vs 10 years), and the most common reason for divorce was ‘personality difference’, followed closely by ‘infidelity’. Just this year, ‘infidelity or extra-marital affair’ took top spot as reason for divorce in Muslim marriages.  There would also be the pressure of ‘remarrying’ within two years as the community supposedly frowns upon single parents. Which suggests that money issues aside, there’s also a hint of  ‘fools rush in’ syndrome. So it’s not just about the ‘affordability’ of weddings that encourages failed marriages (This may well be a myth, you can be charged $1K to $6K just for PLANNING and DECOR alone). One may have to consider whether the union was failed in the first place.

Every once in a while we get annoyed by atrocious singing, throbbing drums, motorcycles chugging and horning, yelling and general littering amid the merrymaking, but I would make the same complaints against Chinese funerals even as a Chinese, just not making a fcuking ass of myself ranting on Facebook about it. I wonder how Amy Cheong would react if someone went:

How many f**king days do Chinese funerals in void deck go on for?F*ck!!!Pay for a real funeral you asshole!How can society allow dead people to lie in a dirty void deck? KNS!

I also stumbled upon a Twitter account of ‘Amy Cheong’ apologising to countless people. I doubt this is the real Amy Cheong, considering that her Twitter icon is that of Ted, the vulgarity spewing bear.

Filed under: 2011, 2012, Bloggers, HDB, Money, Racism, Religion, Weddings | Tagged: , , , , , , , , | 5 Comments »

NS man killed by tree in freak accident

Posted on September 30, 2012 by gdy2shoez

From ‘NSman’s death: Tree was checked in April’, 29 Sept 2012, article by Jalelah Abu Baker and Lim Yan Liang, ST

The site where the fallen tree killed an operationally ready national serviceman (NSman) on Thursday was checked during a routine inspection in April.

The inspection was carried out by the Singapore Land Authority (SLA), which said in response to The Straits Times’ queries last night that such checks included the pruning of trees on state land in populated areas.

“For forested state land next to populated or high-traffic areas, SLA carries out periodic and cyclical checks of trees, and will prune them when necessary,” said an SLA spokesman.

The spokesman did not say how often these checks were made, and declined to comment when asked what the authority thought had caused the tree to fall, citing ongoing police investigations.

On Thursday, Lance Corporal (NS) Tan Tai Seng, 23, was waiting to enter the military grounds of the Ama Keng Training Area in Lim Chu Kang when the tree fell and pinned him to the ground.

When a tree falls by the roadside and no one is there to see it, who do you point your fingers at? SLA, NParks or GOD? April is a good 6 months since this tree was maintained, and according to NParks’ Tree Management Programme, inspection along ‘major roads or parkland’ is done at least once every 18 months, to check ‘health and stability to ensure that trees are safe and stable under NORMAL weather conditions’. Which suggests that the authorities have little control over ‘healthy’ trees still succumbing to ‘tree failure’ in the event of storms. Of course when someone’s life is at stake, it’s no longer ‘tree failure’ anymore, but a ‘freak accident’. In the Garden City, when the bough breaks, it’s not just the cradle that will fall. Vehicles are a favourite target for killer trees. Other hits include houses, hikers, covered walkways and even the NTU hostel. One death is too many still, no matter how much pruning or hi-tech tree tomography the authorities deploy to keep our 800,000 roadside trees (in 2009) in pristine condition.

In 2000 alone, there were at least 3000 cases of trees falling apart, and NParks maintains that the number has been reduced over the years. So how did SLA suddenly get involved in tree management? Earlier in March, one particular huge tree in Upper Bukit Timah which crushed a couple of cars was reported to be ‘managed’ by SLA (after a clarification by the media that it was wrongly attributed to NParks’ charge) with one of the motorists describing it as more than ‘FLIMSY’. It seems that the work to look after our trees is split between these agencies (though they would call it ‘tapping on mutual resources and expertise’), with SLA taking charge of a tree bank consisting of 11,000 trees in 2008. But even SLA may refer you to someone else if you try to seek damages when a giant tree crashes into your house. In the case of a near-fatal bungalow incident in Seah Im Road in 2008, it was EM Services, a property management company. If a tree falls and hits your car in a HDB carpark, a lawyer may tell you to claim damages against your TOWN COUNCIL, though the latter will tell you to speak to your insurance company. Sometimes, the town council may pin the blame on a ‘horticultural contractor’, and even the URA may be answerable to trees falling in their carparks. Like pesky birds, it seems that we’re facing the same accountability problem with toppling trees, and no one knows if they should call the HDB, NParks, URA, SLA, property agents, insurance companes, third-party contractors, your MP or the Archbishop if something unforseen and terrible happens.

Most of our trees were part of a LKY-led ‘green rage’ to artificially landscape Singapore into a tropical paradise, and instead of just focusing on post-mortem fingerpointing, one should think about the tree’s history too, whether it was indigenous to the area or one of those ‘instant trees’ that was erected in a hurry, like a clumsy prop on a shaky wooden stage. Any attempt to sue NParks, SLA or your town council with negligence in the event that a tree murders a loved one would be countered with the ‘Act of God’ defence, unless you could prove beyond a canopy of a doubt that the authorities have not been diligent in their inspections. But just how efficient are these ‘checks’ anyway? In the recent case of a tree crashing a metal roof of a walkway in Sentosa, it was checked merely 3 WEEKS before the incident, though the inspection was managed by Sentosa’s ‘environment and landscape’ team and there was no mention of any agencies’ involvement. If so, SHOULD NParks have been involved? Or is it a case of ‘your tree, not mine’? Are victims of killer trees condemned to resigning themselves to just ‘bad luck’ and endless rounds of ‘passing the parcel’ over which tree belongs to which agency?

It would be unfair to blame the SAF for not training our soldiers how to defend themselves against uprooted trees, but if history prevails, the likely answer given to the distraught family of the deceased is probably a botanical (fungus infection, bad soil) or a meterological one (bad weather, strong winds). Mother Nature already took the blame for being the mastermind behind our flash floods, and now she’s orchestrating death by trees too.  I think it’s time we have an NParks App that alerts Singaporeans to any tree that is ‘due for inspection’ so that we can watch out for falling branches or whole trees going ‘timber!!’ on us if we’re anywhere near. They could call it Angry Trees or something. It could save a few lives and cost much less than a bunch of overpriced bicycles.

Filed under: 2000s, 2012, Bureaucrats, Environment, HDB, Motorists | Tagged: , , , , , , | Leave a Comment »

Queenstown wayanging during the Royal Visit

Posted on September 13, 2012 by gdy2shoez

From ‘Queenstown visit was an exhibition’, 13 Sept 2012, article by Tessa Wong, Singapolitics, ST

Tanjong Pagar GRC MP Indranee Rajah has responded to online criticism of the staged scenes put up at the Queenstown Green playground for the visit of the Duke and Duchess of Cambridge. “The pictures that people have posted do not take into account the context of the visit,” she said.

She was referring to several pictures surfacing on the Internet showing the playground before and during the visit, accompanied with sarcastic captions. Many netizens felt that the sight of residents performing taichi and silat, and using the playground and fitness equipment in the middle of the afternoon presented an unrealistic slice of Singapore life.

She told Singapolitics that the organisers – made up of grassroots groups, the Housing Board, the People’s Association and the British High Commission – had two objectives for that visit. One was to showcase HDB living. The other was to showcase the various cultural and community activities of Singapore.

“At the same time, the organisers were also given a very short timeframe of about 25 minutes to show all of that,” she said, adding that they felt the best way to achieve it was to “do it in little exhibition spots…The demonstrations were to showcase the different types of activities themselves. It was not to suggest that these activities take place at 3pm everyday… It was meant to give a snapshot, and in that sense it was no different from a demonstration of activities,” she said.

Ms Indranee said that as she toured the area with Prince William, he had asked her if Singaporeans actually practice taichi and silat in the afternoon. “I explained that they wouldn’t do so at 3pm because it’s hot, and that these groups were just here to demonstrate… So it was explained to our visitors that we were just showcasing activities,” she said.

Uncle, you can’t get any cuter

The Queenstown wayang is the Singaporean way of laying the red carpet to welcome aristocrats, and somewhat of a hospitality overkill. The image of a playground JAMPACKED with activity looks like a scene taken off a staged musical, a real-life collage of local kampong pasttimes squeezed into a common space, people PRETENDING like they JUST happened to be there at the time.  I wonder who’s the director of this conniving carnival set-piece, thinking it could fool the Duke and Duchess of Cambridge into believing that Singaporeans owe their success today to afternoon playtime and chapteh kicking (Who plays with chapteh these days, anyway?). One can imagine what Will must be thinking while fumbling with a toy not many children actually know about these days: ‘Bugger. Back home we hit these feathered things with racquets. This game is bollocks, now I appreciate Polo better’. Still, he would get thunderous applause even if he so much as tossed the chapteh to a commoner. WITH HIS BARE HANDS.

Will was also cheeky enough to ask if uncles do taichi at 3pm in the afternoon, probably long aware that his trip here is one elaborate, but fishy, show and tell after another. Kudos to the couple for pulling through what seems like a laborious globetrotting courtesy call to celebrate the Queen Mother’s Jubilee, while grinning and bearing with the phony Potemkin-ness of it all. Anyway, the Queen would have spoilt the surprise for them by now. In 2006, she dropped by Toa Payoh to the same rousing lion dance routine, watched a demo of SEPAK TAKRAW (not the most elegant of sports I must say), and of course had to endure some uncle performing TAICHI like waiting for painting on a wall to dry. She also planted a tree. There’s nothing uniquely Singaporean about taichi and lion-dancing anyway. At least a flash mob of the Great Singapore Workout would have meant something.

Queen having a ball

In 1989, the same Queen was greeted by pom-pom schoolgirls while touring Townsville Primary School. She was also caught wearing shoes into a resident’s home during an Ang Mo Kio Town Centre visit. Of course one doesn’t just tell the QUEEN to take off her shoes before stepping into your abode. It’s like asking her if she’s the one who farted at a dinner table.

Exhibition or not, one can’t help feeling that this outlandish choreography is an insult to royal intelligence. I’d assume Will and Kate have done their homework on Singapore before trotting over here. These blue-bloods are probably secretly wishing to see the things low-lifes only whisper about in seedy underground London bars, like:

  • The auntie who feeds stray cats and leaves a mess the morning after
  • The rats that are bigger than cats
  • The stained underwear and sanitary pads which were tossed out of windows
  • People hanging flags of China on their window ledges
  • Children doing homework at void decks
  • The ‘No Urinating’ sign in the lifts
  • The hidden CCTVs which track residents’ every move
  • Loan sharks’ O$P$ calling card
  • And of course, the MILLION DOLLAR flat barely big enough to house the Queen’s corgis

Viewing a slum in a country like Singapore is an eye-opener, not something ‘been there, done that’ which can pass off in a bid for the next Happiness Olympics. After all, these guys spend their entire lives in pageantry, the last thing they need is trying to act like they’re thoroughly impressed. Adieu, Will and Kate, you have been obliging, sporting, very noble and if you’ve been disappointed by this patronisingly sterile charade of  Singapore, a hub of stress, sleaze and scandal rather than a picture of spotless, blissful ‘gotong royong’, then I offer my humble apologies.

Filed under: 2000s, 2012, Fun and games, HDB, Politicians, Public works, Sports, Tourists | Tagged: , , , , | 2 Comments »

$1 million HDB flat nothing to be traumatised over

Posted on September 9, 2012 by gdy2shoez

From ‘Khaw eases fears over $1m flat price’, 9 Sept 2012, article by Rachel Chang, Sunday Times.

News of a Housing Board flat being sold for a record $1 million may be swirling, but National Development Minister Khaw Boon Wan urged Singaporeans not to be “traumatised”. There will always be “units with fantastic views that fetch fantastic prices“, he said of the sale of the executive maisonette in Queenstown, which is still in the works. The price includes a cash over valuation (COV) of $195,000.

“More important is the larger picture,” Mr Khaw said at a dialogue with Sembawang grassroots leaders. “Are prices affordable generally for most units? I think we have largely achieved that in the last few months with the pricing of the new Build-to-Order flats.”

At the same time, he noted that the record resale price was indicative of the fact that “in public housing, we can get very good living conditions“. For example, when the Pinnacle@Duxton flats come onto the resale market in a few years, “there will be many millionaires there”, he noted.

In 2010, a couple of property experts made the following prediction about HDB pricing, when quizzed about the chances of it exceeding the million dollar mark.

(Eric Cheng, ECG Property): ‘Generally, most HDB flats will not go beyond $750,000. I doubt any flats will cross the $1 million mark, at least not for the next two to three years…For $1 million, one can buy a condo unit, or even a small landed property in the Sin Ming area. The valuation for a top-end HDB flat is around $700,000, and who can cough up the $200,000 (COV)?’

(Albert Li, C&H Realty): ‘I think the $1 million mark will take a while to reach. HDB prices may rise, but not so fast.

The above was in response to a Bishan maisonette with roof terrace being sold for a ‘staggering’ $950,ooo to a Singaporean businessman. In the space of 2 years, that record looks set to be broken, the culmination of a series of record sales of public housing that the latest $1 million price tag wouldn’t strike anyone as ‘traumatising’ anymore. Khaw, of course, has a flair for justifying ridiculously priced items, whether it’s Brompton bicycles or designer chairs. Someone could mark up bottled water to $10 and he could explain it away using such high-horse Khaw-conomics. Here, the ‘fantastic’ view, and the breeding of HDB millionaires are in his opinion ‘value for money’ reasons. No wonder Prince William and Kate are paying Queenstown a visit. Residents there can relate to royalty like no other heartlander can. After all, some of them live in ‘very good living conditions’. Fit for a queen, I might add.

Here’s a quick look at astounding 5-room HDB sales over the past few years to explain why our jaws aren’t dropping anymore. If there’s anything that needs to be tranquilised it’s this spell of spiralling prices.

5 room/executive flats

June 2007 – Jalan Membina,  5 room, $675,000, buyer unknown.

June 2007 – Kim Tian Place, 29th floor, $720,000, buyer unknown.

Nov 2007 – Marine Parade, sea view, 18th floor, $730,000, buyer unknown.

Jan 2008 – Queenstown, Mei Ling street, 21st floor, $890, 000, buyer unknown.

April 2010: Bishan maisonette, 24th floor, $900,000, to an Indian Singaporean couple.

Sept 2012: Queenstown, Mei Ling Street, a possible $1 million, buyer unknown.

So in the space of 5 years, top-dollar flats have increased in value by almost half a million dollars. But it’s not just these penthouse wannabes that are getting pricier, they are epicentres sending ripples of escalating prices throughout the neighbourhood. The median resale price of Queenstown flats is currently half a million dollars, something beyond most first-time buyers. Khaw is busy ignoring the ‘halo’ effect of ridiculously expensive housing, while acting like he has one hovering above his head.

Even 4 room flats are catching the fever:

4 room flats:

Nov 2009 – Queenstown, Strathmore Ave, 4 room, 40th floor, sold for $653,000, to an Indonesian PR and Singaporean woman.

March 2010: Bras Basah 4 room flat, 25th floor, in Bain Street sold for $650,000 to a Taiwanese PR couple.

But wait, there’s more. In 2010, a TWO ROOM flat in Chinatown was sold for $245,000, which cost more than a Punggol 4 room flat at the time. We wouldn’t bat an eyelid anymore if the same 2-room can hit the half million mark by the end of this decade. The exceptionally lucky few would benefit from such skyrocketing prices, while the rest of us still staying in Khaw’s majority of ‘affordable’ housing away from these hot districts watch our dreams of upgrading slowly fade away while prices swing wildly beyond our reach and PR tycoons snap up these spots like nobody’s business.

No I’m not traumatised at all, but perhaps the next generation of Singaporeans would, when they realise that while their peers have become instant millionaires overnight from selling the million-dollar flat they inherited from their parents to snap up  condos or landed property, they’re struggling to cope with the mortgage for their 2-room broom closet, which could very well cost as much as a 4-room in Ang Mo Kio today. It would also be a terrible time to get married and settle down, and if the government is serious about promoting family and babies, they should staunch this bloodletting right away, before this becomes not so much property boom as a national DOOM. Maybe a ‘national conversation’ is not as important as PAP’s ministries actually talking to each other for change. Yes, MND (Khaw) and MSF (Chan Chun Sing), I’m referring to you guys. Go cycling together and make friends or something.

Filed under: 2010, 2012, HDB, Money, Politicians | Tagged: , , , | 2 Comments »

Singaporean flying China flag outside HDB

Posted on July 26, 2012 by gdy2shoez

From ‘Police investigate woman over China flag hung outside HDB’, 26 July 2012, article in asiaone.com

A 54-year-old Chinese Singaporean woman is being investigated for an offence under the National Emblems (Control of Display) Act. It is believed that the offence is related to a China flag that was hung over the parapet of a Hougang HDB block, right next to a Singapore flag.

The news first made headlines when photographs were taken of the flag and posted on citizen journalism website Stomp. They have since gone viral, with several concerned citizens asking if it is allowed. In a statement posted on their Facebook page, the police clarified that the public display of state flags of any nation other than Singapore is “generally disallowed,” unless an exception is catered for.

If convicted, the offender may be fined up to $500, imprisoned for up to 6 months, or both.

Flag of our Great Great Grand-fathers

According to the National Emblems (Control of Display) Act, only diplomats, members of the Commonwealth, anyone granted ‘immunities and privileges’ or ships may bear flags. As for Chinese holidays, the closest one falls on 1 Aug and is ominously called ‘ARMY DAY’, while Chinese National Day occurs on 1 Oct. The archaic law (last updated in 1987) only applies to displays that may be viewed in a generally public place from a road, street, footway, passage etc.  You may, however,  still walk about with a Union Jack painted on your face or wear a Japanese Banzai headband without being hauled up for investigations. Football fans throng pubs in World Cup jerseys, flashing national banners in support of their teams. Harley Davidson uncles don Stars and Stripes bandanas while chugging around on their bikes. Swedish flags grace the aisles and cafeterias of Ikea. We’re a bustling bazaar of international emblems, some of which, like the USA flag, have become ubiquitous logos. Yet, we only catch a glimpse of the five stars and a moon decorating our flats once a year. Most of us who complain about eyesore China flags don’t even know what Majulah Singapura means. No one notices the mattress draped over the Singapore flag in the most telling manner above.

Despite a recent wave of anti-xenophobic crusades by the internet community to promote acceptance of our immigrants and their cultural baggage, we cry foul and NIMBY over a China flag hanging over a parapet, which for whatever reason it was put up in the first place, has come to symbolise the sinister beginnings of a hostile takeover.  Our table tennis team, for example, all once swore allegiance the Chinese flag. Even our homegrown singing pastors are paying tribute to ‘China Wine’. We Singaporeans, on the other hand, wrap our side mirrors with images of flag, flip it the wrong way or upside down, cover it with laundry or bedlinen, wear it around our crotch or use it as a mat for some serious teenage hanky-panky. At least someone is treating a flag the way it should be treated.

This isn’t the first time, though, that China or other national flags have been making an insurgence into the heartlands. The richest source for such sightings, unfortunately, comes from STOMP, which is of course, a troll haven for anyone with Photoshop skills and a NIMBY agenda.

That being said, I wonder if anyone would bring an American to task for putting up the Stars and Stripes on the 4th of July.

Filed under: 2012, Foreign workers, HDB, Justice system/Lawsuits | Tagged: , , , , , | 2 Comments »

Elder-care centres bring more deaths

Posted on February 4, 2012 by gdy2shoez

From ‘Woodlands residents worry elder-care centres in estate may mean more deaths’, 3 Feb 2012, article in asiaone.com

Residents of two Woodlands HDB blocks are worried that building an elder-care centre at their void decks may mean more deaths in the area.

Their concern comes on the heels of the Ministry of Health’s (MOH) plans to build an elder-care centre at the void decks of Blocks 860 and 861 at Woodlands Street 83.

…Upset residents from Blk 861 later sent a petition to Sembawang GRC Member of Parliament Ellen Lee voicing their opposition to the plans.

They gave eight reasons for opposing the plan, one of which was that there are not many elderly people living in the two blocks, as well as the reasons given above.

Foreseeing myself aging into a cranky old man who would rather play with jigsaw puzzles alone than burst into karaoke chorus with other old folk, I wouldn’t frequent a void deck elder-care centre myself when I qualify to use one. But to deny others of the opportunity to engage in stimulating social activities like group knitting  over ‘inauspiciousness’, when the same  people are likely to tolerate funerals in their void decks, is absurd. It’s ageism at work when the younger lot of a community do not treat our elders with the customary air of respect, but as a harbinger of death, viewing an elder-care corner not as a sanctuary from an otherwise boring and neglected existence, but a blotch on property value like a wasp’s nest in one’s basement. In fact, I’d be worried about deaths if there were no old people sitting around void decks, because otherwise they’d be at home  staring at walls, slowly emitting the smell of death and found only days after they have expired.

This obsession with all things cursed plagued Woodlands residents last year as well, with residents petitioning to replace a water tank in which a maid was murdered, in fear of consuming ‘blood water’.  Superstitions aside, it’s interesting how such facilities, which really serve as lounges for old people, have been euphemised since the idea was first conceived in the late seventies when void decks came into existence. In 1980, it was called a ‘community home for the AGED’, catering to the ‘destitute’ OLD FOLK with no one to care for them. Of course no one uses the word ‘aged’ anymore in the era of Botox and ‘active aging’, where our seniors are obliged to keep their minds active, continue to play a part in society and forget that they are all shrivelled up, wrinkly, wear dentures and incontinence pads, but can still boogie as well, if not better, than you. Today, people use ‘aged’ only on people who are a few days away from corpse status. The fact is using nice terms won’t make them look any less younger or die later, nor does it make ageing any more pleasurable or less inevitable.

Later in the eighties, ‘homes’ became ‘senior citizen clubs’, which means it’s not just a secure holding area for the elderly anymore, but a place with actual ‘activities’, of which you are a valued ‘member’ of the community. The first ‘day-care’ centre as we know it today was known as the ‘Henderson SOCIAL centre for Senior Citizens’, with its own mini-gym of sorts. In 2000, day-care centres adopted ‘resort styles’ with bingo and mahjong to entertain seniors. I wouldn’t be surprised if they serve up alcohol-free Mai Thais as a welcome drink. The authorities weren’t satisfied with these centres just being satellites of old folk’s homes or rehab centres anymore. With all the fancy naming and sprucing going on, these oldies better HAVE FUN and MAKE FRIENDS while at it. Perhaps that’s the whole point, with a name like ‘elder-care’ and ‘senior’s club’, most of us would ASSUME that our old folks are well taken care of and don’t need our pampering and attention anymore.

Not all’s gloom and doom for senior citizens’ corners these days, for society has imparted on the arthritic and grey-haired an aura of upbeat optimism, an unshakable determination to live their silver years to the fullest, and never has this manufactured, escapist denial of death and loneliness been more prevalent as it is  today. Which is fine by the way, and I may even embrace the illusion when my time comes, though no matter how much one transforms void decks into paradises on Earth as a psychic substitute for sedatives and real family, it wouldn’t soothe the pain of having to face inflated medical and hospitalisation bills, a misery which all the bingo, karaoke and rubber ball squeezing in the world can do nothing about.

Filed under: 1980s, 2012, Funerals/Death, HDB, Superstitions | Tagged: , , | 8 Comments »

Jack Neo thinks an MRT train on fire is beautiful

Posted on September 10, 2011 by gdy2shoez

From ‘Jack Neo criticised for comments made on blog’, 9 Sept 2011, article in asiaone.com

Actor-director Jack Neo has once again come under fire, this time, for comments made on his blog regarding the latest vandalism case at Singapore Mass Rapid Transit’s (SMRT) Bishan depot.

…Members of the public had called the news hotline to complain about Neo’s ”offensive” post which they felt was in poor-taste. In his approximately 1,200-word post, Neo described what could happen if the vandal had managed to hide an explosive in one of the carriages. He expressed in Chinese how “beautiful” the image of a train on fire would be, “barbecueing” its passengers as it hurtles along.

Readers of the Chinese daily responded angrily to the comment, saying that if that were to happen, it would be a tragedy. They also questioned how he could treat the subject so lightly. He goes on to say the incident must be “hard on SMRT’s chief executive officer who had to shoulder all the blame”, and the “rational public” should sympathise with her.

Neo continued, “The CEO has so many things on her plate, and she needs to handle ‘strange’ incidents as well. Like when someone falls on the tracks, or if someone gets caught in between the train doors. Or, if someone chooses to jump on to the tracks to end his life; this happened once before and the family received alot of money…”

To that, a reader said that “as the CEO of the company, of course she (Ms Saw Phaik Hwa) would have to apologise, why should we take pity on her?”

As for the suicide cases, Neo was criticised for being “insensitive” by bringing up the amount donated to the family of the deceased. Said Mr Tan, 50, a taxi driver: “Was he drunk? What he said was very irresponsible.”

The Case of the Unnecessary Apostrophe

Having been in hiding for too long and away from directorial work, it was only natural for Jack Neo to overdramatise a blog post probably intended to be satirical in nature than anything else.  As a Cultural Medallion winner however, he may have crossed the line with the bad timing and jibes at a certain amputated Thai teen’s misadventure on the MRT tracks in view of the flurry of national sympathy following the incident.  Perhaps Jack was obsessing over a comeback plot in mind when he was writing this, his first big budget action thriller and a long awaited return to film making, though any attempt at high octane espionage and suspense would be let down by Jack’s tendency to ruin his movies with ridiculous titles. ‘Where got BOMB?’ and ‘I Not Terrorist’ come to mind. Hit the road, Jack, you’re better off behind a camera than posing as a ‘keyboard warrior’.

If you stop to think about it, it wouldn’t make sense for a terrorist to spray paint an MRT train before proceeding to load it with explosives. Firstly, the anti-establishment mischief of the modern graffiti movement is incompatible with the murderous evil-doing of terrorists.  And it would be dumb to mark a rigged MRT train with graffiti to alert authorities to it in the first place. But here’s a brief but confused history of graffiti in Singapore, from its humble beginnings as plain naughtiness to government endorsed prank to terrorist calling card:

Sometime from the mid 70′s to early 80′s, graffiti was part of a vandal complex of what most would deem flagrant misbehaviour. It wasn’t a global movement or recognised as art in any form, and was  used by naughty kids rather than bohemians with tattoos and cool girlfriends. HDB lifts and void deck walls bore the brunt of the mischief, where instead of anarchic protests or heavy metal logos you have the likes of Carpenter song titles instead.

Vandals listen to the Carpenters

IN 1989, a rocky embankment on the Marina Promenade was vandalised with love messages by amorous vandals. These etchings of passion and rejection, rather than the elaborate, decorative fonts we see today, are now the lingua franca of Facebookers and bloggers. Which is good news for cleaners; love-hate graffiti on the back of bus seats, even sexual come-ons on toilet walls, have declined considerably in recent memory.

Graffiti became a hot-button issue that strained international ties with the Michael Fay incident in 1994. It also made the nation famous for all the wrong reasons, with the rotan becoming a symbol of our ‘barbaric’ justice system. However, it would soon turn out that it’s not just celebrities like Jack Neo who were starting to ‘take graffiti lightly’. In 2004, Today newspaper took it upon themselves to digitally ‘vandalise’ a billboard in front of the National Museum as part of an April Fool’s Joke with the words ‘Casino coming here’. This was when graffiti was catching on as something ‘funky’ and ‘hip’, though the public apparently didn’t get it (and still doesn’t get it till this day). They probably thought Michael Fay was back in town up to no good.

Where is Banksy when you need him

It’s ironic that also around the mid 2000s, graffiti was used as an intimidation tool by loansharks, with ‘O$P$’ becoming a uniquely Singaporean shorthand symbol for extortion. Until recent years, loansharks merely splashed paint or planted the proverbial pig’s head at one’s doorstep. The O$P$ meme turned out to be a quick, effective means of delivering a threat when erstwhile one had to write ‘So-and-so owes us money. Pay now or suffer!’. It turned from a playful fad to a hounding public threat.

Gra$$iti

In 2009, a vandal later diagnosed as schizophrenic scribbled  ‘Hi, Harry lee I Love you’ on  an entrance wall outside Parliament House. Though outwardly hilarious it could also have been interpreted as a form of lowest-denominator political sarcasm.  Or it could have just have been a smitten member of the PA professing his love for the man-god. If not for the quality and context of this misdemeanour, it would have otherwise been a audacious intrusion into the political sphere, a civil disobedience of Berlin Wall proportions.

Awww......

Just to trivialise graffiti further, Singpost created a public furore by launching a series of mailbox ‘vandalism’ as part of a ‘viral marketing’ campaign in conjunction with the YOG in 2010, to spark greater awareness of ‘creativity and self-expression’ in the spirit of the Games. Commissioned graffiti as being ‘out of the box’ and ‘innovative’ is a glaring contradiction to what our penal system spells out about defacing public property, a case of mixed signals  relayed by the Government on whether graffiti is ‘hipster art’ or a ‘punishable crime’. Alas, in the same year, Swiss Oliver Fricker set the record straight by exposing the SMRT security system and spraying ‘Mckoy Banos’ on a docked train, a piece of work which the current ‘Jet Setter’s’ graffiti spree seemed to borrow heavily from. As much as grafitti fans would laud the audacity and talent of these offenders, it didn’t stop graffiti from henceforth being linked to acts of terror, when the Fricker stunt was really a slap in the face of the authorities for initially making a mockery of graffiti art while trying to act cool. Not a squeak from the authorities about Fricker’s work being ‘out of the box’ though, and everyone will agree that the defaced MRT looks way better than an amateurishly ‘defaced’ mailbox below, which resembles the slipshod work of loansharks rather than paid artists. Whether it’s a psychotic ode to the MM, street art, a marketing gimmick or a political statement, graffiti is exhibitionism par excellence, and thrives only because people take notice of it.

My kid could paint this

Filed under: 1980s, 2000s, 2010, 2011, Art, Bloggers, Campaigns/Elections, Environment, HDB, Justice system/Lawsuits, Kids, Local actors, MRT, Public works | Tagged: , , , , , , , | 3 Comments »

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