Sukki Singapora’s ‘albino Indian’ look

From ‘Burlesque babe’, 21 April 2013, article by Melissa Sim, Lifestyle, Sunday Times

For more than a year, burlesque dancer Sukki Singapora, 26, led a double life. By day, she worked in IT support – wearing formal skirts and fitted shirts – but once the work day was over, she cast off her office wear for corsets and sequined outfits. “It was very much a Clark Kent existence,” says Singaporeconnected, Britain-based Sukki, who quit her IT job with the British cycling Olympic team to become a full-time burlesque performer in April last year.

…“I was fortunate enough to be offered enough shows that I no longer needed a day job,” says the dancer, who uses a peroxide cream to create the look of an “albino Indian”

…What keeps her going, she says, are the letters she receives from Asian women and men, nearly 100 from Singapore alone. “Some want to learn how to do it. However, more often than not, they are too scared to try because of their strict backgrounds and feel they have no one to talk to except me,” she says.

So she set up The Singapore Burlesque Society, a Facebook group which has 64 members, to provide a “safe community” for those interested in burlesque in Singapore. She also started The Singapore Burlesque Club, a touring show which has a policy of hiring at least one Asian burlesque performer at every event.

…Denying that she chose her stage name because it was more exotic to be from Singapore than the UK, she says: “I picked it because it represents where I felt I was from. I still consider myself a citizen.”

Born to an Indian Singaporean father and a British mother, both doctors, Sukki Menon was a Geography major before achieving grand diva success. She became a British citizen when she was 18, and would give our very own drag queen Kumar a run for the money. Most Singaporeans, however, would rather play Angry Birds than see dancers dressed up as peacocks, this despite Moulin Rouge and the less successful Burlesque movies spurring the revival of a vintage stage show. ‘Showgirls’ probably gets more illegal downloads than both movies combined.

Sukki isn’t the first Asian sensation to seduce audiences with wild, sexy dancing. Malaya used to have her very own ‘Queen of Striptease’ in the 1950s, none other than the late, great Rose Chan. Referred to as a ‘stripper’ in those days, her shows were banned here by the police in view of its ‘improper nature’. She was also badass enough to wrestle with pythons. Today’s burlesque artistes settle for boas instead.

I suppose many Singaporeans have matured since then to accept burlesque dancing as a respectable profession, nude or no-nude, but it’s mostly viewed as a hobby to tone your abs or surprise your husband on Valentine’s Day (for $180 you can have 10 hourly lessons of Exotic Dance/Lap Dance). I’m not sure if albinos or Indians would take offence at Sukki’s use of whitening face cream. I’ve never seen an Indian albino in the flesh, but I doubt they look like Courtney Love as Sukki does. Going ‘Blackface’ for your company DnD with a Bollywood theme, however, is a terrible idea.

Crazy Horse, which bears similarities to burlesque though it boasts as the most ‘avant garde’ all of Paris cabarets, failed in Singapore after just 14 months.  Supporters were quick to denounce the country for being intolerant of such ‘raunchiness’. But it also offended housewives who thought it was ‘pornographic’, ‘derogatory to women’, and promoted all sorts of wrong values. A layman would find difficulty differentiating burlesque, cabaret and exotic dancing, though flashy costumes (and eventual lack of it), ample cleavage, flirtatiousness and feathers are all common elements. Some would call her a ‘high-class’ stripper, and in fact Sukki in her Facebook page has acknowledged her job as a ‘striptease artist’. Here’s a video of her jiggling out of traditional Indian dance costume into a slutty red bikini:

Burlesque dancers tend to give themselves names indistinguishable from adult movie stars or James Bond girls (think Pussy Galore).  Not all have glamorous monikers like Dita von Teese, which sounds like a villain from a 101 Dalmations cartoon. Here’s a quick test to see if you know your burlesque from your XXX stars.

1) Aurora Galore
2) Aurora Snow
3) Lexi Belle
4) Dottie Lux
5) Dirty Martini
6) Summer Haze
7)Lady Beau Peep
8)Vicious Delicious
9)Kalani Kokonuts
10)Calamity Chang
11) Kitten de Ville
12)Lily Labeau

*2, 3, 6 and 12 are porn actresses

Dancers also tend to argue that their art is a ‘celebration of feminity‘, yet  there is an internet magazine for ‘all things burlesque’ named BurlesqueBITCH.com. An organiser for international events like the All Asian Burlesque Spectacular calls itself THIRSTY Girl Productions.  Sukki herself acts in The PEEP SHOW, and performs at a La Bordello Boheme. It’s all in the name of good ol’ naughty fun, of course, but I doubt the folks at AWARE are amused. I’m sure the Esplanade can bend its ‘No Sleazy Uncles’ rule to slot in a Sukki show somewhere.

Incorporating Singapura in her stage name aside, she has also wowed audiences with what she calls The MERLION strut,  a homage to a ‘mythical beast’. There is also the “Sparkle for Singapore’, complete with ‘glistening Singapore orchids’. We should rope Sukki in for the next National Day Parade since we’ve done pole-dancing anyway, and pair her up with Kumar in a Battle of the Divas. With our ailing fertility problems, perhaps sexy burlesque is one way to sizzle up our bedrooms, and no one better to promote it than our Burlesque Ambassador and Superheroine, Sukki Singapora herself.

About these ads

Gwiyomi dance craze is too ‘act cute’

From ‘The next dance fad: Gwiyomi’, 14 April 2013, article by Kezia Toh, Sunday Times

A saccharine-sweet pop tune by a South Korean indie singer has inspired a rash of dance spoofs among K-pop stars. And Singaporeans are getting in on the act. Gwiyomi, a song released earlier this year by Hari, has sparked a popular repertoire of hand gestures.

Performed to the ditty’s lyrics of a girl asking her boyfriend never to leave her, the “gwiyomi” – which means “cutie” – involves index fingers pointing to puffed cheeks, and the miming of bunny ears and heart-shaped signs.

The final flourish? Six light kisses – one for each finger on one hand, and both thumbs.

…Gwiyomi early-adopter (Alvin) Chua says gwiyomi will probably not take off in the way that the “highertempo and more catchy” Gangnam Style did here.

“In countries such as Thailand or Taiwan, it seems to be the norm for girls to ‘act cute’,” he says. “Here in Singapore, they probably view it as being overly vain.”

Somewhere in North Korea a madman is threatening to kickstart nuclear Armageddon and his southern neighbours are not only unfazed by his warmongering, but acting cute with bunny ears and finger smooching, slowly turning the rest of the civilised world into a bunch of giggly pansies. Or maybe that is South Korea’s secret counter to the North’s ballistic aplomb all along; If the North get infected with this craze, you’ll see Pyongyang soldiers saluting their Leader with Nyan Nyat cat poses and too busy gwiyom-ing to start a fight. Either that or the entire nation, bred on austerity and grimness, will barf to death. I wonder if KFC is thinking of using the No. 6 sequence to reboot their ‘Finger Lickin’ Good’ campaign. Gwiyomi makes Madonna’s Vogue look like performance art.

Something about acting cute with gestures feels distinctly Japanese, and one can’t help but wonder if K-pop adopted this contagious cute overload from the ‘kawaii’ craze many years back. The Japanese equivalent of gwiyomi was used in 1987 to describe local celebrities with that wide-eyed, deep-dimpled innocence, whose gestures were easily described then as ‘childish’. Today, if you call a Hello Kitty or Gwiyomi hardcore fan ‘childish’, you’ll likely be torn to shreds by the K-pop army with a flurry of cat paws. When I did the Moonwalk in my primary school days, all I got were awe-struck faces. If I do Gwiyomi now, I risk getting a box of lollipops for the remainder of my birthdays.

Similar dance crazes have their roots in Japanese kawaii/anime culture. It has been more than a decade since we were hit by the ‘Para-para’ wave, made popular by Hongkong idol Aaron Kwok. Slighter lower on the ick factor, the para-para at least seems to be a better cardio workout than gwiyomi, though some have complained that it may affect the studies of obsessed teens and isn’t ‘part of our culture’.

Copycat fans like Alvin Chua above suggest that Singaporean girls may find gwiyomi embarrassingly ‘vain’, but I believe there is one group who may take to Gwiyomi as babies would pucker up their lips to the sight of a plump nipple: Mambo Jambo fans. Be warned, this is strangely hypnotic stuff.

You can see the similarities in the range of moves: The number pointing, palms to face, bang-bangs, heart shapes, fake yelling, pick-up-the-phone, sad-face, thumbs-up. All that face touching should prompt HPB to ramp up hand-washing campaigns, though this gwiyomi thing may be more infectious than the H7N9 bird flu. I also wouldn’t be surprised to see some of our MPs taking to gwiyomi as how they warmed up to Gangnam style. Tin Pei Ling is probably practising this is secret, without the Kate Spade box this time. Maybe our kindergartens are already using gwiyomi to teach nursery rhymes as we speak, adding an extra dose of cute to classics like Itsy Bitsy Spider or I’m a Little Teapot.

As social animals, we evolved finger-gesturing for the essential purpose of non-verbal communication before we learnt to even speak, whether as an act of aggression (Robert De Niro’s ‘I’m watching you’ in Meet the Parents), tongue-wagging play (Neh-ni-Neh-ni-Boo-Boo!), flirtation, triumph (V for victory), acknowledgment (thumbs up, OK), tribute to the devil (horns), or making pacts (pinkie-locks). It explains why the gwiyomi has universal  appeal; the perfect combination of cute, mimicry, synchronised playfulness and the ability to bring out the gurgling baby in all of us. God help us all.

There is, however, one solution to end this trend for good in Singapore: Steven Lim, you are our only hope.

Pulau Ubin villagers paying rent to SLA

From ‘No plans to evict Pulau Ubin residents’, 13 April 2013, article by Eugene Neubronner, Today online

Contrary to online speculation and some media reports, the authorities yesterday clarified that “there are no plans to evict the households currently residing on Pulau Ubin or develop an Adventure Park on the island”. Issuing a joint statement, the Ministry of National Development (MND) and the Singapore Land Authority (SLA) reiterated: “The planning intention is to keep Pulau Ubin in its rustic state for as long as possible as an outdoor playground for Singaporeans. Given this, there is no need for the residents to move out.”

The speculation started after some residents on the island received a notice signed off by an official with the Housing and Development Board’s (HDB) Land Clearance Section, which carried the header “Clearance scheme: Clearance of structures previously acquired for development of Adventure Park on Pulau Ubin”. The authorities clarified that on March 12, the HDB, acting on behalf of the SLA, informed the residents of a census survey in Pulau Ubin. They added that these households had been informed as far back as 1993 that they would be affected by a public development project, which included the development of a recreation park.

“To align with the rustic nature of Pulau Ubin and its planning intention, outdoor adventure elements were included in the recreation park, for example, trails for cycling and hiking, campsites and amenities like shelters and toilets,” the MND and the SLA said.

…The MND and the SLA said that the affected houses sit on what is now state land, and the households were now residing on state land without the required Temporary Occupation Licence (TOL). If they wish to stay on, they would need to obtain a TOL and pay rent — generally pegged at market rate — to the SLA.

If you want a taste of true ‘kampung’ spirit, look no further than Ubin, often cited as the ‘last bastion’ of rustic, indigenous wilderness. 10 years ago you could spot leopard cats, hornbills and wild boars and bask in the nostalgic Old-World smell of chicken droppings. Thrill-seeking lovers could elope there to set up campfires, cook meals in mess-tins and get lost in mangroves without being marauded by eco-tourists and moutain bikers. But perhaps not for much longer, based on the revelations of the White Paper, as we are already seeing the gradual transformation of what was once an idyllic stone quarry sanctuary into Sentosa in one of her pre-casino incarnations, a ‘fun-in-the-sun’ getaway for fans of outdoor adventure.

The selling point of Ubin has always been a ‘rustic CHARM’, a ‘throwback’ to old Singapore, but history tells us that our relentless march towards progress will somehow squeeze every last drop of its kampung soul dry. Today it may be a bike park or OBS school, tomorrow a luxury beachside villa, and you could still call Ubin ‘rustic’, ‘raw and untouched’, even when this ‘charm’ has been reduced to a puny saltwater pond in some rich man’s backyard and the only fishermen you see on the island are the ones charging you for prawning rod and bait at a spa resort, or giving urban folk a demo of how to toss a fishing net in the visitors’ centre. A far cry from Ubin’s strange, astounding natural and social history, one that boasts of temple devotees of Barbie dolls, straying elephants from Johor, sightings of dugongs, monitor lizards as well as the site of a 1920′s Chinese secret society ritual.

According to Infopedia, an ‘expressway road and a Mass Rapid Transit rail system linking the mainland’ was planned for after the year 2030. As it is, Ubin already boasts a couple of resorts, including the Celestial Resort owned by Marine Country Club which aims to ‘give glitzy Sentosa’ a run for the money, where Singaporeans and can go unwind, enjoy lush greenery, and frolic around in wild lallang for a staycation . A 100 year old kampong house has also been refurbished as a Lonely Planet endorsed Cookery Magic culinary school, where you can make Nasi Kerabu with ‘jungle herbs’. Plans for an adventure park comes as no surprise really; it’s just a sweatier theme park with no rides, air-conditioning or Wi-fi, and has been talked about for decades. In 1996, then Minister of National Development Lim Hng Kiang announced that HALF of Pulau Tekong would be turned into a ‘recreational’ centre. I remember drinking fresh coconut from a dishevelled hut along one of the bike trails some years back. On my next trip to the island there could very well be a Gong Cha outlet in place of it.

Although the government hasn’t forced their hand YET, the slow creep of modernisation and tourism overspilling onto Ubin because of our mainland exploding at its seams may drive residents away from the maddening crowd sooner or later, with or without the additional rental fee. In 1989, S Jayakumar said that Ubin residents were ‘not immune to the law’, and if they were, ‘drug addicts and other criminals’ would be headed for the island. Ironically, the island once housed political detainee Lee Tee Tong in 1980, as well as a boatload of Vietnamese refugees in 1978.

So urban dwellers, time to grab your tumblers, hiking boots and mess tins, relish the last remains of a kampung island, and let’s all sing Dayung Sampan, shall we?

Haka flash mob needs a public entertainment licence

From ‘NZ restaurant apologises for haka flash mob’, 16 Sept 2012, article in Soshiok, asiaone.com

A New Zealand bar and restaurant in Clarke Quay has come forward to apologise for “misunderstandings”, after about 20 of its staff performed a traditional haka dance along a walkway in busy Orchard Road last Sunday. The haka – a traditional Maori dance made famous by New Zealand rugby team All Blacks – was performed in a flash-mob style.

It received mixed reviews among netizens after a video of the performance was posted online earlier this week, on websites like citizen-journalism website Stomp, with some calling it “cringe-worthy” and others calling it “good fun”.

The video shows participants, some topless, breaking out into loud chanting in a crouching stance, slapping their hands against their bodies and stamping their feet, all of which are part of a haka dance. my paper understands that the restaurant, Fern & Kiwi, had not applied for a public-entertainment licence from the Singapore Police Force prior to its staff appearing in Orchard Road.

Any public performance requires such a licence. The restaurant’s owners were called in by the police for questioning yesterday. They declined to give more details as the case is ongoing.

During university orientation days we had to do silly things in crowded places just to entertain our sadistic seniors, and I never knew if they had to apply for public performance licences. If I did, I would have probably declined embarrassing myself on the basis that such shenanigans are downright illegal and I can’t afford to have a criminal record when I still have my entire future ahead of me. Damn you orientation camp leaders!

Applying for a grant to do something ‘spontaneous’ totally defeats the purpose of a ‘flash mob’, though what Fern & Kiwi has done in Orchard Road may be considered as a cheap advertising stunt as well.  I visited the Facebook page and was pleased to note that it wasn’t an organic vegetarian hangout as the name suggests, but a bar catering mainly to expats with a passion for the muddy sport of rugby. It also bears a logo that bears a faint resemblance to a controversially-conceived clothings line.

FNZK

‘Flash mobs’ used to be meaningless stunts done in the name of pure fun, and has evolved into something that blurs the line between ‘performance’, ‘advertising’ or ‘public service message’. Just recently some mothers got together in a ‘Latch on for Love’ ‘flash mob’ to breastfeed their babies. I suspect it’s not just the message of ‘mother’s milk is the best’ that was disseminated, but the very swell of maternal love and hormones in the air may have female passers-by spontaneously ovulating. It was also, to some sensitive viewers who can’t tolerate the sight of bare nipples, dangerously close to the word ‘flash’ being interpreted in another sense altogether. What I really want to ask, though, is: Did they need a public entertainment licence for this?

Latch mob

In celebration of World Sleep Day 2012, 90 people gathered at Raffles Place to take a NAP, it too was labelled a ‘flash mob’ endorsed by the Singapore Sleep Society. First of all, why wait until someone organises a flash mob to promote World Sleep Day, considering all the years of festivities that I missed? Shouldn’t flash mobs be about people actually entertaining someone? Did anyone express concerns about terrorist attacks or a sweeping pandemic after witnessing a pile of motionless bodies lying on a grass patch?  Did they need a public entertainment licence for this?

In March some 300 One direction fans hogged parts of Orchard Road in a ‘flash mob’ dance-off to the UK boyband’s Greatest Hits. Well it’s a MOB alright, and while some may call it harmless fun, calling this a ‘flash mob’ is like describing a riot as a ‘public nuisance’. Shouldn’t there be some regulation against obstructing an entire pavement with synchronised boyband mayhem?   A bunch of Filipina maids also danced the weekend night away outside Ion last year, although no one referred to it then as a ‘flash mob’. Did they need a public entertainment licence for this?

You can also propose to your girlfriend via ‘flash mob’, a trend that threatens to ‘spoil market’ for guys planning to use the ‘Let’s buy a HDB’ ruse. Do you need a public entertainment licence to dance to (the painfully obvious) Bruno Mars’ Marry You? Can you even play Bruno Mars without breaching some public broadcasting copyright law? I could post the proposal video, but that would be infringing this blog’s policy on videos deemed too mushy for general viewing. Why THANKS A LOT, FRIENDS WITH BENEFITS, now I can’t impress a woman unless I take up dancing lessons and pay a bunch of people to dance around her to her favourite Taylor Swift song.

(It’s in Russian because the other clips have errors)

In 2008, 400 people froze for 5 minutes in the middle of Orchard Road. If you’re new to performance art, you would have been wondering if you were trapped in some kind of time warp, or part of some Just for Laughs gag. After Michael Jackson’s death, we had tribute Thriller flash mobs. Frankly the second one (video below) gave me goosebumps. Did you need a public entertainment licence for these too?

Fans of Oppa Gangnam style, don’t even THINK about it. Or perhaps I’m already too late..’Opps’.

So as you can see, you make ‘flash mob’ anything and everything, from groupie dancing to exuding bodily fluids and even SLEEPING, as long as it doesn’t have a ‘political’ agenda. What’s inconsistent is how the requirement for permit is applied, and if F&K were ever charged for flouting the law, I’ve given some examples which got away with it for their lawyers to argue the case. My guess as to why the police took notice is that Haka performers look scary and glower like they’re out to hurt someone, especially when they mimic throat-slitting, while no one in their right mind will go out to book a lactating woman.

Queenstown wayanging during the Royal Visit

From ‘Queenstown visit was an exhibition’, 13 Sept 2012, article by Tessa Wong, Singapolitics, ST

Tanjong Pagar GRC MP Indranee Rajah has responded to online criticism of the staged scenes put up at the Queenstown Green playground for the visit of the Duke and Duchess of Cambridge. “The pictures that people have posted do not take into account the context of the visit,” she said.

She was referring to several pictures surfacing on the Internet showing the playground before and during the visit, accompanied with sarcastic captions. Many netizens felt that the sight of residents performing taichi and silat, and using the playground and fitness equipment in the middle of the afternoon presented an unrealistic slice of Singapore life.

She told Singapolitics that the organisers – made up of grassroots groups, the Housing Board, the People’s Association and the British High Commission – had two objectives for that visit. One was to showcase HDB living. The other was to showcase the various cultural and community activities of Singapore.

“At the same time, the organisers were also given a very short timeframe of about 25 minutes to show all of that,” she said, adding that they felt the best way to achieve it was to “do it in little exhibition spots…The demonstrations were to showcase the different types of activities themselves. It was not to suggest that these activities take place at 3pm everyday… It was meant to give a snapshot, and in that sense it was no different from a demonstration of activities,” she said.

Ms Indranee said that as she toured the area with Prince William, he had asked her if Singaporeans actually practice taichi and silat in the afternoon. “I explained that they wouldn’t do so at 3pm because it’s hot, and that these groups were just here to demonstrate… So it was explained to our visitors that we were just showcasing activities,” she said.

Uncle, you can’t get any cuter

The Queenstown wayang is the Singaporean way of laying the red carpet to welcome aristocrats, and somewhat of a hospitality overkill. The image of a playground JAMPACKED with activity looks like a scene taken off a staged musical, a real-life collage of local kampong pasttimes squeezed into a common space, people PRETENDING like they JUST happened to be there at the time.  I wonder who’s the director of this conniving carnival set-piece, thinking it could fool the Duke and Duchess of Cambridge into believing that Singaporeans owe their success today to afternoon playtime and chapteh kicking (Who plays with chapteh these days, anyway?). One can imagine what Will must be thinking while fumbling with a toy not many children actually know about these days: ‘Bugger. Back home we hit these feathered things with racquets. This game is bollocks, now I appreciate Polo better’. Still, he would get thunderous applause even if he so much as tossed the chapteh to a commoner. WITH HIS BARE HANDS.

Will was also cheeky enough to ask if uncles do taichi at 3pm in the afternoon, probably long aware that his trip here is one elaborate, but fishy, show and tell after another. Kudos to the couple for pulling through what seems like a laborious globetrotting courtesy call to celebrate the Queen Mother’s Jubilee, while grinning and bearing with the phony Potemkin-ness of it all. Anyway, the Queen would have spoilt the surprise for them by now. In 2006, she dropped by Toa Payoh to the same rousing lion dance routine, watched a demo of SEPAK TAKRAW (not the most elegant of sports I must say), and of course had to endure some uncle performing TAICHI like waiting for painting on a wall to dry. She also planted a tree. There’s nothing uniquely Singaporean about taichi and lion-dancing anyway. At least a flash mob of the Great Singapore Workout would have meant something.

Queen having a ball

In 1989, the same Queen was greeted by pom-pom schoolgirls while touring Townsville Primary School. She was also caught wearing shoes into a resident’s home during an Ang Mo Kio Town Centre visit. Of course one doesn’t just tell the QUEEN to take off her shoes before stepping into your abode. It’s like asking her if she’s the one who farted at a dinner table.

Exhibition or not, one can’t help feeling that this outlandish choreography is an insult to royal intelligence. I’d assume Will and Kate have done their homework on Singapore before trotting over here. These blue-bloods are probably secretly wishing to see the things low-lifes only whisper about in seedy underground London bars, like:

  • The auntie who feeds stray cats and leaves a mess the morning after
  • The rats that are bigger than cats
  • The stained underwear and sanitary pads which were tossed out of windows
  • People hanging flags of China on their window ledges
  • Children doing homework at void decks
  • The ‘No Urinating’ sign in the lifts
  • The hidden CCTVs which track residents’ every move
  • Loan sharks’ O$P$ calling card
  • And of course, the MILLION DOLLAR flat barely big enough to house the Queen’s corgis

Viewing a slum in a country like Singapore is an eye-opener, not something ‘been there, done that’ which can pass off in a bid for the next Happiness Olympics. After all, these guys spend their entire lives in pageantry, the last thing they need is trying to act like they’re thoroughly impressed. Adieu, Will and Kate, you have been obliging, sporting, very noble and if you’ve been disappointed by this patronisingly sterile charade of  Singapore, a hub of stress, sleaze and scandal rather than a picture of spotless, blissful ‘gotong royong’, then I offer my humble apologies.

Principal stalking students on Facebook

From ‘Parent claims principal stalks ex-students on Facebook’, 16 June 2012, article in asiaone.com Edvantage

…Another principal has made the news with his Facebook exploits – namely  for posting comments on pictures of his ex-students that a parent claimed to be “sexy and seductive”. The parent added the principal had made these comments when he was Physical Education teacher and is now a principal of a secondary school in the North.

A parent only known as Nel voiced his concerns on local citizen journalism site, Stomp. He said, “We (Nel and his wife) were prowling through our teenage daughter’s Facebook when we saw her ex-PE teacher making the comment ‘Nice!’ on one of her profile photos!

“Feeling uneasy about such a comment, we went into his Facebook account and discovered that he has been stalking his secondary students on Facebook, visiting their photo albums repeatedly and posting comments like ‘Nice!’, ‘Cute!’, ‘Sweet!’, ‘Pretty!’ on their sexy and seductive photos!” The parent added that the principal had crossed a line by commenting on these pictures. He also drew references to senior education officials Lee Lip Hong and Chua Ren Cheng who were charged for sleeping with the underage prostitute.

He concluded by saying, “What kind of message is this educator sending to his pupils when these postings can be openly viewed by all? “

No sane figure of authority will risk his reputation flirting stupidly with young girls on Facebook, and this overprotective, self-confessed ‘prowling’ parent should ask himself if these postings were in fact the work of an imposter latching onto the principal’s real account, or some prankster creating a fake account just to sabotage a man’s career, rather than jumping the gun and accuse the head of a school of preying on young girls. Flirting principals aside, what about the problem of his attention-seeking camwhore daughter posing ‘sexily and seductively’ and thriving on cheap flattery from random strangers? Or perhaps he’s using his daughter’s  narcissism as bait to lure curious boys and suitors for him to lash out at and revenge-stalk later, whether or not they’re pimply classmates or grown men with a weakness for underaged prostitutes.

Still, as a worried parent, such fears are not totally unfounded. In 2010, a relief teacher who added a student to his Facebook contacts ended up making indecent proposals once he got her mobile phone number. Anyone with filthy intentions would opt for the more personal mobile phone approach rather than soliciting through Facebook for all to see. So if ‘Nel’ needs to know if his sexy daughter is being stalked for real, I’d suggest he probe her phone’s message list first, instead of telling the whole world there’s another pervert principal on the loose and tarnishing the profession. Other parents would run a sneaky background check on teachers with Facebook accounts, and raise alarm bells if they discover he’s somewhat of a ladies’ man who poses with random women in clubs in his free time. Yet nobody rummages through parents’ Facebook accounts to expose what bad parenting skills, dress sense or taste in music they have. We have a Faces of Haters already, maybe it’s time for a ‘Faces of Kamchiong Parents’.

As if pupils and teachers haven’t had enough of each other’s faces during schooltime, social media has somehow morphed into a after-hours badmouthing battleground for students to rally against bad teachers, teachers to rally against nuisance or difficult students, or parents to shame overbearing teachers on their kids’ behalf. All this puts our educators at a sorry disadvantage. Some parents would forgo Stomp or Facebook altogether and make a police report directly for cases of ‘verbal abuse’.  A teacher with a Facebook account used to be ‘cool’ at some point. Today, he’s a potential pedophile who’ll tell you how ‘nice’ you look when he’s actually thinking, and maybe doing, something else while viewing your deliberately jaw-dropping photo which alone could pass off as a CV for a lucrative career in amateur porn.

Some teachers, assuming their FB identities are genuine, turn out to be pretty immature cyberbullies themselves.  In 2009, one mocked the atrocious standards of grammar in her students’ assignments.  Some of a more sadistic nature bragged about the number of lines their student were made to write out of punishment, or resorted to insults like ‘My stupid student is such a goner’. In a reversal of the above incident, another posted an exchange between herself and a student over a mysterious smell, hinting at sexual harassment by the student in 2011 (What’s that smell? Your pxxxy!).

Yet, just as there should be a penalty for teachers acting like angry teenagers, the ones who don’t bitch about their students online or even own a Facebook account should be protected against busybody parents or being maliciously framed by anyone with a grudge, even if these pranksters were students themselves. Facebook has no place in a teacher-student relationship, just as it has no place between a subordinate and a boss.  Anyone caught defaming an educator through FB should be dealt with as it were a ruthless slap across the face, just as any disgruntled teacher expressing their violent slapping fantasies online deserves to be disciplined. The cost of ‘losing touch’ with your FB-savvy students by not communicating online is nothing compared to the ordeal of just ONE parent reporting you for harassment if you so much as ‘act cute’ online or if your FB profile is not Virgin Mary enough. Even a smiley face may be misconstrued as a sly invitation to strip live on cam, not to mention a ‘Niiiicceeee!’

My grandfather road vandalised

From ‘My grandfather road vandal arrested’, 4 June 2012, article in asiaone.com

Police have arrested a 25-year-old woman who is believed to have vandalised several roads in Singapore. Between May 17 to 21 this year, the Land Transport Authority (LTA) saw that the words “MY GRANDFATHER ROAD” were painted along Robinson Road and Maxwell Road and reported the matter to the Police.

It also reported that circular stickers printed with captions were pasted on a pavement around Lau Pa Sat and on a road traffic sign along Robinson Road. The female suspect was arrested at her residence in the eastern part of Singapore on June 3. The officers also found several paint-stained stencils and several pieces of stickers printed with captions. These items were seized for investigation.

Investigation is ongoing. The police are also working with LTA on earlier reports of round stickers found affixed on other pedestrian crossings at various places.

The case is classified as Vandalism under Section 3 of the Vandalism Act, Chapter 341. A person who is convicted for the offence shall be punished with a fine not exceeding $2,000 or to imprisonment for a term not exceeding to 3 years and shall be liable to caning subjected to the Criminal Procedure Code 2010.

Sins of the Grandfather

Spray painting a road may land you 3 YEARS in jail and a severe beating, but knocking over someone while drunk driving and splattering someone’s BLOOD all over the road gives you a miserable SIX months sentence, or a fine between $1000 and $5000. So, the police have spent the past month tracking down someone placing stickers on pedestrian crossing buttons, while elsewhere cyclists and joggers are being mowed down by maniac drivers.  Instead of monitoring speedsters, they’re keeping their eyes peeled for sticker vandals, who do nothing more than kill pedestrians’ time, not kill THEM unlike some nuisance drivers we know.

The colloquialism ‘My grandfather’s road’ has been used since the eighties, often used to describe motorists taking their own sweet time on the roads, or road-hoggers. In this case, the phrase could also double up as a visual protest against people who think they ‘own the road’ so they could streak about in the early wee hours in their Ferraris. Just a couple of days back, the ST ran a piece on these mystery ‘Press until Shiok’ stickers, that these  antics were ‘to the amusement’ of Singaporeans, with some speculating that it could be a smart ‘guerilla marketing’ campaign. One interviewee remarked that this shows ‘the vibrant culture of Singapore and a let-your-hair-down attitude’. More like ‘let-your-pants-down for a whipping’ attitude. It almost sounded light hearted and did not end in the typically admonishing ‘Anyone with information on the culprit are to report to the police immediately’.  Next thing you know, the one putting a smile on people’s faces with catchy slogans and making Singapore ‘hip’ again is being hauled to court for vandalising public property. Well thanks a lot, Straits Jinx. Don’t ever attempt to act cool again.

The ‘grandfather road’ vandal brings to mind the ‘white elephant’ incident at Buangkok MRT, where cut outs were put up to mock the two-year delay in the opening of Buangkok MRT station. It remains unknown as to who was ultimately responsible for this ‘outdoor protest’, though it was reported that a ‘veteran grassroots leader’ was behind it and his identity remains protected till this day.  The blatant symbolism seemed to prick the conscience of the authorities that they forgot about the elephant displays being vandalism at all. Instead the police had to investigate if there had been any breach of the ‘Public Entertainments and Meetings Act’. Which means if you’re sticking it to the authorities though a piece of art, you’re ‘protesting’ without a permit. If you’re just trying to be funny with some stencils and stickers, you’re a menace to society.

A couple of years back, the Speak Good English campaign embarked on their own spate of state endorsed ‘vandalism’, putting ugly sticky notes on lampposts and hawker centre tables to instruct people on on speaking properly. So if it’s for a ‘good cause’ and you have a permit, marring the urban landscape is OK, but not if you’re a street artist inspired by the ‘functional’ landscape graffiti of Banksy. With an actual sense of humour. You can’t even walk around with a piece of chalk these days without a cop telling you to stay away from roads and buildings, as if you were in possession of a stick of dynamite instead.

Postcript: Fast turning out to be a anti-establishment cult heroine, ‘Sticker Lady’ is actually Samantha Lo, artist and founder of online magazine RCGNTN. Her Pinterest is still available for viewing, where she appears to have a special interest in typography. Also see the rest of her ‘Press’ series (Tumblr disabled), including ‘Anyhow Press Police Catch’, ‘Press for Nirvana’ and ‘Everything Also Press’. OK I made the last one up.

Then there’s the question of whether My Grandfather Road is considered ‘art’ at all. According to a ST Forum writer and SOTA student Darshini Ramiah (Suspect art has no value, 9 June 2012, ST Forum):

While the works are humorous, parodying Singaporean culture and Singlish, they seem to have no value whatsoever. Furthermore, the removal of the ‘art’ from public property involved spending money, time and effort.

While the suspect’s intentions may have been light-hearted, she appears to have had no consideration for the impact that her work may have caused. Art should serve to enhance and better a community. But the suspect’s work seems to be nothing more than a tongue-in-cheek attempt to garner public attention.

The writer fails to mention what is considered ‘proper’ art and how this makes a community ‘better’, using vague words like ‘value’ and ‘enhance’ without explaining why art MATTERS. Value, like art, is subjective and in order to argue if what Sticker Lady did has any ‘value’ in the very mundane sense of dollars and cents, consider if anyone will purchase any of her sticker creations after her conviction (It would probably sell like Hello Kitty plush toys). In terms of more abstract ‘value’, her ‘tongue-in-cheek’ humour may have made someone’s day, or made people conscious of their furious but useless pedestrian button pressing, i.e altered someone’s behavior, at least temporarily.  In contrast, an almost blank piece of canvas may be clamoured to death as a timeless masterpiece, but if it leaves a viewer nonchalant and deemed as mere wall filler, how does it ‘enhance’ the community, despite being extremely ‘valuable’? Does ‘Brother Cane’ and its pubic hair snipping have any ‘value’? When Josef Ng broke the law (for public indecency) staging the act, like how Samantha Lo committed an offence (defacing public property), does it mean that the original Brother Cane wasn’t art?

Sticker Lady was eventually charged with mischief in late March 2013, in which the maximum penalty is one year’s jail and a fine. It was revealed that one of Lo’s creations was labelled ‘So Kancheong For What’. Though it was placed near a pedestrian crossing, I wonder if she was really referring to the government asking us to have more babies.

Fifty Shades of Grey banned from libraries

From ‘Library’s shades of double standards’, 2 June 2012, ST Life!

(Dr Oh Jen Jen): While I understand the National Library Board’s reluctance to add the Fifty Shades trilogy to its catalogue, I cannot quite accept its practice of double standards (No Fifty Shades For Library, Life!, May 29).

I consider novels by Sidney Sheldon, Jackie Collins and Harold Robbins, available at public libraries here, equally, if not more, sexually explicit than E.L. James’ fluff. Another title I spotted on the shelf is Bret Easton Ellis’ American Psycho, which contains graphic violence and sexual content.

As already mentioned by another avid reader, Anne Rice’s Sleeping Beauty series is also easily available. Protecting young, impressionable minds from undesirable influences is important, but the above examples demonstrate the NLB’s inconsistency in its choices.

Young adult fiction is now dominated by the likes of Stephenie Meyer and Suzanne Collins. Meyer wrote Breaking Dawn, which features a childbirth scene that I found positively horrifying despite the nature of my job. Collins’ Hunger Games trilogy, on the other hand, describes a world where teenagers participate in government-sanctioned slaughter-fests, and the novel appears on the American Library Association’s list of frequently challenged books for 2010, citing ‘sexually explicit, unsuited to age group, and violence’ as reasons.

And, yes, both authors’ series are found in the National Library’s catalogue. My parents never restricted my reading choices and I believe that open dialogue and guidance are far more beneficial than an outright ban.

Library in a knot over 50 Shades

As a hugely popular blockbuster series that started off as Twilight fan fiction, it is unlikely that ‘young impressionable minds’ will get their hands on 50 Shades without making reservations way in advance. If the kids can’t wait to read BDSM prose in a series that brings new meaning to ‘young ADULT fiction’, or if bored housewives long to fulfill their darkest desires vicariously through a tortured ‘heroine’, they can always try their luck at Kinokuniya for a quickie browse, if not download the e-version online.

If we need some sleazy teenage prose to save the book format , get people to read on the trains instead of playing with their phones, and keep our bookstores, but more importantly the entire paperback industry, alive, then so be it. In fact, in the original Life! article, a book publisher quipped that this ban is a ‘welcome shot in the arm for struggling bookstores’. So even if the library decides to put M18 warning labels or place 50 Shades so high up on the shelves that kids can’t reach it, you will have Ye Ol’ Bookshops shouting the promo poster  shamelessly behind stacks of this adolescent smut in display windows everywhere, at discounted prices if necessary, maybe bundled with some handcuffs or leather straps for good measure.

Here are other ‘classics’ which were deemed too ‘pornographic’ or offensive for our library collections:

1) Henry Miller’s Tropic of Capricorn (1938):  Banned in America for almost 30 years, Tropic is an autobiography of its very horny, misogynistic author and his sexcapades in New York City, where women are described by Miller as ‘supercunts’. Another novel, Plexus, was described by a blogger reviewer as containing ‘unapologetically group sex, drunken abuse of colleagues, scatological enterprise, what may amount to rape in the modern context..’

Horny Miller

2) DH Lawrence’s Lady Chatterley’s Lover (1928) : This literary romp-fest needs no introduction.

3) Nikos Kazantzakis’ The Last Temptation of Christ (1953 ): Adapted into a movie of the same name which was also banned for blasphemous depictions of the Lord Jesus Christ. Goes without saying that some sex is involved.

4) Judy Blume’s books: Accused of promoting underage dating and eventually sex, Judy Blume at first glance appears to be the most innocent of the lot, that is, until you read ‘Are You There God, It’s Me Margaret‘ where a tween prays to dance with the hottest boy in school ‘just once or twice’. She even has a book titled ‘Freckle Juice’, which could be mistaken for the title of a Barely Legal porn DVD series. If 50 Shades advocates hollow, brutal sex among consenting adults, then Blume’s puberty fantasies are baby steps towards ultimate debauchery.

5) Helen Bannerman’s The Story of Little Black Sambo (1899): A children’s picture book which was allowed for loan in our libraries (Book that raised storm abroad is popular in Singapore, 7 Jan 1991, ST) but, as the title suggests, slammed for racist depictions of dark-skinned people elsewhere. Do kids these days still read Noddy?

As social norms of what distinguishes ‘art’ from ‘porn’ evolve, what was once unacceptable (infidelity, multiple partners, inter-species sex) is now commonplace in ‘young adult fiction’, and it’s only a matter of time before voluntary degradation and humiliation that are the hallmarks of sadomasochism join the rest of the erotica bandwagon in toeing the line of public decency. If prestige is at stake, and if NLB insists on portraying itself as a responsible purveyor of wholesome literary entertainment, then banning a book like 50 shades makes sense, though one should question whether we should rely on librarians to decide for a bunch of uncontrollable, sex-crazy teens as to how far one should relent on graphic sex for the sake of ‘artistic merit’. By fuddy-duddily clamping down on such popular literature,  the library is not so much a place to cultivate the reading habit anymore, nevermind the rainbow murals and funky furniture. With reference materials available at the click of a mouse, what was once a nourishing wellspring of information and imagination has turned into a study centre, a lounge for uncles to read newspapers, or an internet cafe for schoolkids to log on to Facebook when their parents aren’t around.

Until the day when those dark smudges around fashionable young girls’ eyes are no longer vampire goth-inspired makeup but actual bruises, or if you no longer see bracelets around their wrists but rope burns , 50 shades and its torture-kiddy-porn  SM spinoffs are here to stay. We’re no longer in Sweet Valley High territory anymore.

Xiaxue taking revenge on Facebook bullies

From ‘Blogger Xiaxue fights back against Facebook abuse’, 25 May 2012, article by Grace Chua and Jessica Lim, ST

MEN who this week called popular blogger Xiaxue a ‘stupid bimbo’ and a ‘whore’ online are getting a taste of their own medicine. She is fighting back by posting their photos and information on her blog, in an attempt to show that they do not have much of a leg to stand on in the looks and intelligence department themselves.

The furore started when photos of her with two friends, taken without permission from their blogs, surfaced on the Facebook page of political website Temasek Review on Monday, Tuesday and yesterday, with an invitation to caption them. The photos of the three – Xiaxue and her friends Qiu Qiu and Sophie – were taken at a People’s Action Party (PAP) rally in Aljunied GRC during last May’s general election. In the photo, Xiaxue, 28, and Qiu Qiu, 24, have PAP logos on their faces.

…Commenters responded to the Temasek Review’s invitation readily: ‘Cheap b****,’ said one. ‘Pretty and sexy girls, which part of Geylang they work?’, said another. To get back at them, she trawled Facebook for their photos and information – and Facebook was obliging, because many of their profiles were public.

…’She added: ‘What kind of men would say this kind of thing? Singaporean men are such bullies. They think I’m a nobody – just a random girl they can bully.’ Among the men who featured in her gallery of ‘bullies’ were several who are married with children.

…One of the victims of Xiaxue’s revenge, swim coach Lim Soon Chwee, 34, told The Straits Times last night that his comment, ‘Pretty and sexy girls, which part of Geylang they work?’ was incomplete. ‘I didn’t mean that at all,’ he said, adding that he was actually trying to defend her.

…Another man who got one back from Xiaxue, Mr Hong Xing, a 35-year-old father of one, was less forgiving, because the photo Xiaxue held up for ridicule also featured his wife and child. The engineer admitted that he had insinuated that Xiaxue was an underage prostitute, but said he preferred women in more conservative clothes.

‘Look at what she is wearing. When she bends down, you can see her breasts,’ he said, adding that he has seen prostitutes in Geylang who dress this way. He added that he might not have posted the comment if he had known she would see it, but that she should not have posted photographs of his family online. He said: ‘My wife feels really bad. This is between Xiaxue and me. She shouldn’t have attacked my family.’

This girl has a reputation of not giving a fuck, and whatever one’s position on such merciless revenge, this incident has unveiled the social cost of ridicule if you happen to step on the toes of someone immensely popular, while allowing yourself to be exposed via Facebook. Of course Xiaxue isn’t a ‘nobody’, some have even revered her as ‘a slice of Singapore’. Xiaxue.blogspot.com has even been archived by the National Library Board, somewhat like the Declaration of Independence from the National Treasure movie. A million light years from now, aliens will be downloading and translating her blog out of a time capsule and wondering what the ‘KNN’s scattered all over her posts mean.

Celebrities will be targetted from whatever portal there is available for mudslinging, should trolls choose to show their face or hide behind a cloak of anonymity. Most stars would ignore the verbal hooliganism, but Xiaxue has answered, somewhat defiantly, the ‘What if celebrities bite back?’ question. The very convenience of commenting on a Facebook  page or website without the hassle of registering and thinking of passwords has made people forget their place in cyberspace, that the target of their insults, especially one with the classic hallmarks of a narcissism complex (like everyone else who posts stuff on Facebook), is bound to find out through not just her loyal fanbase but from her haters as well. It’s time to finally figure out those privacy settings instead of checking out ex-flame photos, guys.

One could argue one has every right to throw baseless insults at the expense of people you hardly know in the name of ‘entertainment’.  In real life it’s called gossip, and celebrities used to take the slimeballing as part and parcel of the job, while some comedians do it for a living.   When a site claiming to be a ‘socio-political’ blog like TR encourages such behaviour with a seemingly innocuous ‘caption contest’, it’s obvious that you’re not going to get anything remotely ‘political’, witty or smart. I’ve seen the pic myself and all I could think of is whether one of the girls was a spokesperson for Pepsi Cola instead of a PAP supporter from the way her face was painted. One of the victims featured in the ST article even tried to deflect attention away from his prostitute insults by talking about Xiaxue’s BOOBS. It’s like you just dumped cowdung on someone’s head and then saying that you smelled like shit before that anyway. Not clever at all, man.

The web is no longer the venting channel we were once so used to where you can get away with snide, anonymous remarks, curse any saint, god, politician or grandmother you want and leave no trail behind. You could get charged for concocting hoaxes of NS men getting killed (via another ‘Temasek’ clone site), threatened for relaying some juicy tidbits about the PM’s brother(Temasek Emeritus), or blasted for inserting LOLs in all the wrong places. Hell, it’s much easier these days to get into trouble name-calling than downloading hardcore bestiality porn. Xiaxue decided to save on lawyer fees and instead dished out a characteristically bitchy mode of punishment, the online equivalent of catching a molester, pulling down his trousers, strapping him in public and having his wife and kids recoil in horror instead of calling the police. Not a pretty sight, but somehow painfully, worryingly effective. Xiaxue playing the avenging vigilante-angel card is likely to start a anti-bullying meme among blogger celebrities with a similar reputation for attracting all sorts of ‘whore’ accusations, that you’re no longer ‘pwned’ if your occupation, hobbies, innocent pets, embarrassing Bejewelled scores and ugly photos get leaked onto a revenge post, but ‘Xiaxued’. All you need are tens of thousands of followers and have a face that at least some men will get an erection to.

But isn’t Xiaxue herself guilty of flogging strangers, you say? Isn’t her meanness and sharp tongue the secret to her success ? In a 2007 post, she had a field day flaming the ’7 most disgusting bloggers in Singapore’ , victims include the hapless Steven Lim (‘overhanging foreskin with smegma’),  Maia Lee (‘loserish’) and amateurs like Celeste Chen (‘attention whore’). In an attempt at satire she put herself in the list as well. So Xiaxue, of all people, in her ‘do onto others’ element, should expect to receive the same sort of treatment from those she chooses to be nasty to.  In 2005, someone was so offended by her he/she decided to hack her very bread and butter, her blog and e-mail accounts. Over New year in 2006, a netizen petitioned against her ‘racist’ post for a remark about foreign workers (banglas) molesting local girls at Orchard Road Xmas eve/New Year parties (Netizen petitons against blog, 29 Jan 2006, ST). Rival sex kitten blogger Dawn Yang slapped her with a lawyer’s letter for ‘defamatory remarks’ in 2008 (Xiaxue won’t say sorry to Dawn’, 23 July 2008, ST).

By putting random men in the spotlight and getting their families caught in ‘friendly fire’, Xiaxue seems undeterred from past experience and may be setting herself up for another round of hater retaliation. One of these guys may even file a police report for ‘harassment’, but I suppose that’s a risk she’s willing to take, just like these slap-happy morons who compared her to Miss XXX, underaged prostitute and asked for ‘prices’ while leaving their Facebook profiles open to scrutiny from not just Xiaxue herself, but their bosses and wives as well, like sticking an ang pow over your anus before a charging bull. People have mostly good things to say about her ‘heroics’, though.  AWARE treats her like some kind of Joan of Arc now, referring to her post as ‘EPIC’, just like nearly everyone else who read it. This incident also deserves a spot on Oprah because of how ‘You Go Girl-ish!’ it has all become.

Then I read that this woman is married and it makes me suddenly realise how woefully OLD I am. Ris Low, please don’t get any ideas, wherever you are.

Killer Ferraris on congested roads

From ‘Gerard Ee rejects call for curbs on fast cars’, 15 May 2012, article by Ethan Lou, My Paper

MR GERARD Ee, chairman of the Public Transport Council, has rejected calls for tougher restrictions on high-performance sports cars following the fatal three-vehicle collision in Bugis involving a Ferrari.

Instead, he blamed reckless drivers and not fast cars. “Low-performance cars can also be going at 100kmh and beat the red light,” Mr Ee told my paper last night. In a post on citizen-journalism website Stomp yesterday, a netizen known as “Ban it” proposed that high-performance sports cars be banned on congested Singapore roads.

The netizen wrote: “As a small country, should we accommodate such high-performance cars on our increasingly packed roads?”

While most Singaporeans are reeling from the shocking video, others are hurling abuse at the dead PRC speedster. The reactions from Twitter are flushed with unanimous anger towards the departed, with insults like ‘bastard’ ,’Ferrari fucker’ and terms like ‘murder’ being tossed around. A case of flogging a dead horse perhaps, but anyone who has seen how the maniac smashed into the taxi with the relentless ferocity no Michael-Bay special effects could possibly match, killing two innocent people, would be tempted to think the Ferrari driver was asking for it. It adds an ironic twist to how someone once suggested that there should be a death penalty for speeding. Taxis seem to bear the brunt of sports car collisions; In April 2011 and July 2008, taxis collided with a Lamborghini and Mitsubishi Evo 9 respectively, the latter fatal for the taxi-driver involved.

The media is still milking the tragedy dry with the expected ‘mystery nightclub hostess’ angle, hoping to reap some scandalous, poetic justice out of a terrible situation for all families involved. Taking these monsters off the road won’t help matters, and nobody who could afford to drive a Ferrari would waste it by sticking to the speed limit. Like guns Ferraris don’t kill people, drivers do. Except that while most of us yield pistols, those who could afford it go for machine guns and missile launchers. This guy was freaking Rambo, and he bit the bullet hard.

It’s easy to associate Ferrari drivers with a certain ‘fast and furious’, decadently lavish, Type A lifestyle, though some loutish towkays who pick fights with random youths may own one too. In some tragic cases, the allure of  the testosterone and adrenaline cocktail that comes with driving such cars prove too much for children of FATHERS who own them (Mazda MX-5) (Teens killed in horrific Sixth Ave  car crash, 5 June 2008, ST). Still, most owners should be familiar with the temperament of their beasts and pay extra caution on the roads BECAUSE they are Ferraris, and because they’re expensive. Ma Chi could have been an experienced racer with hardly any incident during his racing streaks, no thanks to the bewildering generosity and ‘support’ from a wife who allowed her husband to sneak out with his toy in the wee hours to break the law, oblivious to how dangerous his addiction to speed is. Even the professionals on the circuit crash and burn, and maybe this isn’t really about drunkedness, the distraction of an attractive hostess/mistress, or whether PRCs can drive, but simply horrible luck; You can totally trash a sports car but still end up unhurt, while your passenger gets killed all because of you.

In 2010, Regan Lee lost control of a Mazda MX-5 during a test drive, and the car ‘flew over the road divider, smashed head-on into a black BMW, flipped over it and crashed down into a van in the other lane’ – an orgy of wanton destruction. You would have thought the guy would have been pulverised to bits, but he emerged unscathed. His female passenger, on the hand, was killed and all he got was a driving suspension. Maybe these guys were playing Stare and Drive,  like what the folks from Fast and Furious do to impress girls.

Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

Join 170 other followers